Just Because She's Beautiful Doesn't Mean You Aren't

I came across this quote a while back and it hasn’t left my mind since. 

As women, for some reason, we have a tendency to compare ourselves to one another. I’m not sure if it was Barbie or mainstream media, but somewhere along the way, we fell prey to this bad habit even in this female-empowering time in which we find ourselves.

Perhaps you’re not aware of it, but we all do it to some extent.

Some prime examples are instances where we’re dealing with an ex-boyfriend or an ex-something, or maybe even a current-something. We’ll be lurking on their pages and see that they liked another girl’s picture or tweet. And what is the first thing we do?

We click on the girl’s page.

Then we start checking their social media and show her to our friends and ask, “is she prettier than me?”

Most of the time, our friends will say “no,” and proceed to talk about all of the qualities we have that she doesn’t. It’s their way of making us feel better about ourselves. And whether we admit it or not, it does make us feel better, at least for a little bit. But ultimately, it does nothing to enhance or diminish our appearance.

What we don’t realize is that we’ve probably been on the other end of this story at one point or another. In fact, we may have played every role. The girl asking if she’s prettier, the friend telling her “no,” and the girl on the other side of the phone someone else is comparing themselves to.

We are all somebody’s “Is she prettier than me?” And that shouldn’t be flattering. Instead, it should concern us that we are propagating the question.

So, next time your friend asks you if she’s prettier than someone else, don’t say “no.” Instead say, “you’re both pretty.” Because, as crazy as it sounds, it’s allowed! And maybe that’s the first step towards breaking this bad habit; understanding that we can be pretty together, and we don’t have to bring someone down to build ourselves up. It is not a label in limited supply and it is not a label for which we need to compete for. Yeah, she’s beautiful, but just because she is— doesn’t mean you aren’t.