In a world where labels are basically stamped on your forehead, it’s so easy to see yourself as less than what you really are. Both, women and men, go through some hard and tragic events in their lives. So, why is it that women are always the ones that are “playing the role of a victim” or victimized in all situations? Imagine, going through something life changing and no one acknowledging your efforts to restore your life and the process you’ve been through. Instead, when they look at you and all they acknowledge is the incident that happened. All questions revolve around “how was it?” or “are you still suffering?”
Rape, abuse, domestic violence, and so many others are things that people don’t like speaking of but when they know you’ve been through something like this, you are automatically associated with these concepts. Except the first thought that comes to mind isn’t about how well you’ve been doing, instead how it happens and whether you were asking for it or not. These “trends” about gossiping of unfortunate events are some of the hardest obstacles you need to surpass in your recovering process, and these are also the things that open wider wounds and create insecurities. However, once the storm has passed and a new light begins to shine in your life, there is one simple thing you need to remember: you won.
That man that broke your soul, that man that dared lay his hands on you, that man that yelled so many times and made you scared to even speak… you went through it all, you got out, and you are now someone that would never take life for granted again. Being on the outside looking in, scars are just scars and they can no longer have any control over your life.
No one can control tragic incidents or can predict them, but you do have full control of what you decide to do with yourself afterwards. Sitting around and dreading life cannot be a state of mind you continue to have. Don’t let the labels of the world become a part of you. Proving to yourself that you will get up the next day, conquer everything life throws at you and that you will get better is all that matters. Seeking for help, talking to someone, and maybe even changing your daily routine in order to find yourself are all positive steps to take. No one can tell you how to heal, and no one can tell you that you are a victim for the rest of your life. As hard as the concept is to grasp, life moves on and how you move on with it will determine your future. You’re not stuck in the past, so don’t allow others to see or treat you as someone that’s weak and frail.
Above all, remember, you will have a day where your anxiety won’t peak and you won’t dread starting a new day: that’s YOUR day. That sense of pride and accomplishment will come, and NO one can take that from you. You’re no longer that “girl” that got abused, you’re now that woman who lived through it all and came out stronger.
cover photo: https://www.flickr.com/photos/coopsays/7669519528