Let’s be real: people can be mean and judgmental, especially in New York where everyone is trying to “make it.” Dating can be hard in general, with balancing work or school and a social life, but dating as a full figured woman can sometimes be even more daunting. Here are some tips on how to navigate the dating world as a curvy woman.
- Whether you are a size 2 or 22, truly loving yourself is key
No matter how much you put yourself out there in the dating world, if you are not happy with who you are and how you look, it will be difficult to find and maintain a meaningful relationship. Self-doubt, physical insecurities and pressure on yourself to be somebody you’re not will be detrimental - the dating world will chew you up and spit you out. Being happy and secure with who you are is the only way a relationship can truly flourish. Making yourself lose weight will not make you happy or more “lovable,” those things come from within.
- Be confident and people will see that!
This may sound like a given, but it’s important to exude confidence on a date. If you’re confident in who you are and how you look, you are going to have a much more positive dating experience. If you’re constantly worried about your outfit or if your stomach rolls are showing, your date is going to sense this. Repeat after me: you are valuable and worthy of dating. Go out there, be yourself and have fun!
- If someone doesn't like you for who you are, THEY ARE NOT WORTH YOUR TIME
There are plenty of guys or girls out there who are secure in themselves and who will like you no matter what your size is. Finding that needle in a haystack can feel quite difficult, but someone who treats you well and respects you is worth the wait. Don’t short change yourself and settle on someone who makes you feel bad about how you look.
- Don't assume that he/she won't be into you
There are guys and girls out there who will be attracted to you, no matter what your size. They might seem a bit harder to find but they are so worth the wait. Just like people come in all shapes and sizes, people are attracted to all different shapes and sizes. Don’t go into a date assuming that they won’t like the way you look, that will only hinder your confidence! Keep an open mind!
- Don't let your weight run your love life
Insecurities can run your life if you allow them to. Letting your weight or your dress size take control of your love life and how you go about dating will only hold you back. Only going out with people who you think are in your “league” or will “tolerate” how you look will lead to you being unhappy in a relationship. And to be honest, someone who cares about something so superficial doesn't sound like someone you'd want to be in a relationship with anyway. Be fearless and date who you like, don’t settle for just anyone.
Of all of the qualities we care about in dating someone, a person's weight should never be one of them. People come in all different shapes and sizes, none of which are any less deserving of love than another. Just be confident in yourself and I promise you'll find your fairytale.