I am the oldest of three girls raised by a single mother. Though life is often unorganized and chaotic, it is good, and I owe that to my mom. I’d like to think that being raised by a single mother has been to my advantage. She may not have realized at the time, but her smallest of actions have taught me about practicality, humility, and love. These lessons have given me a third dimension, and have helped shape who I am today. Here are 5 things I learned from being raised by a single mother.
The importance of being realistic
As far as dispositions go, there are some people that look at a glass half empty and others half full—my mom would tell me to stop analyzing the water and just drink it. She sees the situation for what it is and acts accordingly. This quality is grounding.
How to be independent
In my house there has never been a question as to whether my sisters and I could do something, only how we were going to do it. Together, my mom and I sanded down my bedroom furniture and painted it white to put in my new room. I have witnessed her hall mattresses up stairs and change the battery in her car. Every year, we carry in the Christmas tree and spend what feels like hours making sure it is straight. Today, I just go for it—even if I don’t have an exact game plan. Through her example, my sisters and I were shown that there are no limitations to what we can do.
It’s okay to ask for help
I have watched my mom as she raises three kids on her own with little support, sometimes struggling. At moments, she has had to ask for help. Through her example, I have learned it’s okay to admit you can’t do it all on your own. My mom taught me to set aside my pride, no matter how difficult it may be. Asking for guidance does not make you inadequate; it makes you stronger.
How to get the job done
I have never met another person besides my mom who always gets the job done. At the end of the day, she figures it out, no matter what. I don’t think I could be more grateful for growing up with her as my final pillar, someone I can always rely on. Her dependability is something I try to mirror in my everyday life.
The importance of family
In a house of four women, nothing is harmonious. Someone is always yelling at someone, storming up the stairs, throwing the remote across the room while the other stands in front of the TV, or screaming “you’re the worst sister ever.” I credit that to estrogen. Amidst the chaos my mom always says, “At the end of the day you only have each other.” After many years of opposition, I’m starting to believe it. These are the women I love and support unconditionally.
Between stress and an overloaded schedule, I don’t think my mother has realized the profound impact she has had on our lives. Often when she is just trying to make it through the day, my sisters and I are astounded by her strength and accomplishment. She is smart, self-sufficient, and yes—way cooler than I’ll ever be. Thank you for everything Mom, I love you.