It all started in high school when my best friend quit the softball team and joined the track team. She was an amazing softball player and it was a shock to everyone when she switched sports so suddenly. I didn’t think anything of it at first, I was just happy to have her on the track team with me. After practice, she would tell me she was going home to do more workouts. I really didn’t think anything of it, I thought she just wanted to get better at running. I was wrong.
It was on her birthday when I noticed things were really wrong. We had gone out to dinner, something we always would do on the weekends. Then, we went back to her house to hang out and watch movies, a fun girl’s night to end her birthday. She went upstairs to the bathroom and was there for over an hour. After 20 minutes, I became worried and went to check on her and she reassured me she was alright. More time passed and I began to feel like something definitely was wrong.
When she came back, I confronted her. That’s when she told me she was forcing herself to throw up. I thought maybe what she ate was bad, but apparently this was something she had been doing for a while, and I hadn’t even noticed. She told me not to tell anyone, or we wouldn’t be friends anymore, so I didn’t. I didn’t want to lose our friendship, so I kept my mouth shut.
Weeks passed, and I noticed my friend becoming thinner and thinner. People would tell her she looked so good, and that encouraged her to eat less and less. I noticed the little things that no one else seemed to notice like her “forgetting” her lunch or not wanting to go out anymore. The worst feeling was watching my best friend struggle and not being able to do anything about it.
Her mom took her to a physical and they informed her weight had dropped significantly and her heart rate was extremely low for her age. She was sent to a cardiologist where she was told if she didn’t do anything about her weight she would be in big trouble. She refused to accept the fact that something was seriously wrong. She was in complete denial. In her mind, she still saw herself as overweight and unappealing. It wasn’t until weeks later when she had fainted, that she knew she needed to get help. She was hospitalized that week, and spent the rest of high school in a clinic for her disorder.
It took my best friend months to realize she needed help. She had gone from loving her body to hating it in a matter of seconds. My biggest regret is not saying anything. I watched as this horrible thing was happening to her and I didn’t do anything about it. The reoccurring thought always occurs that maybe I could have prevented the whole thing from starting if I had just spoken up.
I have supported my friend with her disease for the past 4 years. I have watched her become a stronger person, both mentally and physically. She has has grown into a beautiful, smart, and strong woman whom I look up to. I admire her strength and have watched first-hand the amazing person she has become.
My friend is not the only one with a story like this. In the US, 20 million women and 10 million men suffer from an eating disorder; whether that be anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, or binge eating disorder. More than 50% of girls and 30% of boys experience some type of eating disorder in their teenage years. And most of those cases go unreported for various reasons.
February 21-27 is National Eating Disorders Awareness Week. Throughout the week, NEDA encourages everyone to bring awareness about eating disorders. The theme this year is “3 Minutes Can Save a Life: Get Screened. Get Help. Get Healthy.” If you or anyone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, encourage them to take this online screening. Though it will not give you a confirmed diagnosis, it can get you on the right track to help.
For more information and how to get help call the NEDA Helpline at (800) 931-2237 or check out their website for more information. And always remember you are not alone.