It was a beautiful fall day. The leaves had just started to turn and Columbus break was just around the corner. I was sitting in the 3rd floor lounge of McCormick reading for my Philosophy class when my iPhone started to vibrate. A text from my boyfriend, a text from a friend asking me to like his latest Insta pic, and a few notifications for friend requests on Facebook. That was the last straw. I got my computer out and deactivated my Facebook, deleted my Twitter, and Instagram. I had completely fallen off of the face of the earth. I felt free: well, for a whole of maybe 30 seconds. I started receiving text after text from people asking why I un-followed them? What was going on? Soon after, some of my “friends” started to ignore me because I had messed up their follower/following ratio by “un-following” them. So how did I get here? How did social media take such a drastic turn that made me, a millennial, do the unthinkable? The answer was simple: the people around me.
Most say that sophomore year is a rough one, and I am a strong advocate for it. Sophomore year makes you really define who you are and what you want to be, where you want to go and start realizing the goals that you want to achieve. But most importantly, you start to realize the people that you want along for the ride. When I moved in sophomore year, I was very excited for what the year had in store for me. I had just turned twenty so that alone was freaking me out but I was excited to start saying “oh I’m in my ~*twenties*~,” accompanied by my famous hair flip. I wasn’t a teenager anymore but I didn’t feel like an adult. I was also very excited to be student leader on campus and my new role at Her Campus Fairfield.
As the weeks went on I started to realize that the friends I thought I had were all interested in the pictures we took and the amount of likes and retweets they got. They even planned out their post to make sure they posted their pictures during a time when they got the most likes. Anyone who knows me now can say that I’m about the moment. I’m about being present and enjoying the company of others. I love going out on day adventures and being around positive people. I absolute hate when people pull out their phone and start filming something for their Snapchat Story so that everyone in the world knows what they’re doing. People get consumed with sharing their lives with EVERYONE just so others know they are having “fun”. I started to separate myself from those types of people. I didn’t want to spend my time posting pictures so that anyone who followed me knew what I was doing. Everyone knows that if you’re spending time filming for your Snapchat, where you’re at isn’t that fun.
After I hit my breaking point, I started to realize how much happier I was. Yes, I wasn’t included in Facebook groups. Sometimes I wasn’t even invited to birthday parties for friends because I was “missed” since I didn’t have a Facebook. But the friends that were worth keeping always texted me. They managed to remember me and always sent me a quick text with the weekend plans and if I wanted to come. I developed true friendships with people that understood what it meant to be present. People asked me what I was up to and had actual conversations with me instead of me stalking their social media accounts to see what they were doing. Some people even called me on the phone; it was unheard of!
I also started to read more and decided that working for a women’s magazine one day was the type of journalism that I wanted to be doing. I started to make note of all the things I wanted to accomplish and started to focus on me instead of everyone else. I picked up two minors, had an internship, and had two jobs. I was never happier. I was where I wanted to be, surrounded with the people that I wanted to be with.
Yes, giving up social media took me out of the competition. But I just didn’t want to race for the likes, retweets, and shares. I just wanted share my happiness with others. Now as a 21 year old junior, I am back on social media on all platforms. But I won’t add or follow people that aren’t part of my life anymore because social media is my platform and I will share with the people that stuck by me and showed me how to get to the path where I am at today.
Cheers my friends!