There are several relationships in a girl’s life which she cherishes, but two of the most important are their friends and their significant other. But what happens when these two clash? You can let it turn into World War 3 or you can diffuse the soon-to-blow-up bomb. The issue of having your friends and boyfriend not get along can be a tough one, especially at college where we basically all live together. Here are a couple of things to keep in mind when this problem arises:
Both parties think they are right…
Your friends think your boyfriend is an a**hole and your boyfriend thinks your friends are ridiculous- this is just one version. Either way, once they have their mind made up, it’s going to be hard to convince them otherwise.
One of them is probably/may be right…There is a possibility that your boyfriend may be that a**hole your friends accuse him of being and it’s possible that your friends are the utterly crazy and judgmental people your boyfriend thinks they are. You are going to have to actively and objectively see both sides. I know personally, my friends ended up being right and this was hard to accept.
It’s important to stay neutral…
No matter what the outside opinions are, you love your friends and you love your boyfriend (probably). It’s important not to encourage the negative talk against either party. You want to stand your ground and let both groups know that even though they both are very important, that’s exactly the point- they are BOTH important and they BOTH are going to be in your life as long as you say so.
Let both parties know their opinion does matter…Even though you may not listen to or agree with your friend and or boyfriend’s opinion, it is important that they know their opinion does matter. They are just trying to look out for your best interest and it’s important that you keep their good intentions in mind.
Making decisions…If you chose to pick one side over the other or there is an issue that divides the parties (example: a break up with your boyfriend or the end of a friendship with a friend) again it is important to make sure it is YOUR decision. Don’t let other people’s judgments or opinions dictate your life. Think things through and make sure that the decisions you are making are right for you and exactly what you want.
The Roommate Scenario… If your roommate and boyfriend don’t get along it’s tricky because your boyfriend is involved in your roommate’s life as well. In this situation you need to be a little more considerate to their feelings. This may mean going to your boyfriend’s room more or having a talk with your roommate and trying to come to a compromise. Talk it out!