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5 Reasons You Should Make the First Move

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Olivia St. John Student Contributor, Fairfield University
Danielle Tullo Student Contributor, Fairfield University
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Fairfield chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

This is a sponsored feature. All opinions are 100% from Her Campus.

There are many reasons why we are hesitant when it comes to making the first move: we don’t want to come off as desperate, we are old-fashioned but, most of all, we fear rejection.  What we usually forget, however, is that men share these same concerns. Here is why you should forget about tradition and beat the fellas to it.

1. Confidence is sexy.Men love confident women. There is nothing more attractive than a woman with confidence. When you put yourself out there and approach a guy who you’re interested in it really shows you are comfortable in your own skin and, better yet, you’re not afraid to show it.

2. Get to know the shy guys

There are plenty of cocky assh*les who have no problem hitting on you, but did you ever stop and think that they might not be the type you are really looking for? Your secret admirer could be crushing on you and you may not even know it because he hasn’t approached you yet. Surprise him and beat him to it. You have no idea what you could be missing out on.

3. Being bold will make you stand out in a positive way…Respect. 

College guys are not typically used to girls being the ones to make the first moves.. Surprisingly enough, a strong personality will stand out a lot more than caked on make-up and revealing clothing. Be brave! Going up to a guy, introducing yourself and making an effort to know him will give you the upper hand to those just waiting around to get hit on by some d-bag. Keep it cool and don’t come on too strong. Just be yourself.

4. Break down those traditional boundaries.

As much as we wish in were like the 1950s where a man would ask for your father’s permission and show up on your doorstep with flowers, it is a little different nowadays. Now I’m not saying chivalry doesn’t exist, it just may be a little harder to find… and that’s okay. It’s 2014 ladies and you know what? It’s even better than the 50s because we are in control. It’s okay to make the first move and if you do, you will feel even more confident and empowered. Go after what you want. The ball is in your court.

5. Rejection is not the worst thing

Rejection – such a harsh word. Nobody wants to be rejected. As traumatizing as it may seem to go up to your crush and get the cold shoulder, there are far worse things in this world. Keep in mind you are making the first move because you are a confident and beautiful woman. Regardless of the reaction you get, be proud for putting yourself out there. If someone doesn’t reciprocate, think of it as his loss – because it is. Don’t be discouraged because EVERYONE gets rejected at some point. Being rejected by someone who obviously isn’t meant to be just makes you one step closer to finding your perfect match.

 

Senior at Fairfield UniversityCommunications and English MajorTour Ambassador, Writer, Opportunist
Danielle was previously the Deputy Editor at Her Campus, where she oversaw social and content strategy, lifestyle, beauty, fashion, news, and entertainment. Prior to joining Her Campus, Danielle worked at House Beautiful as Senior Lifestyle Editor, directing and producing feature videos and stories. Danielle also served as Snapchat Editor at Cosmopolitan, overseeing the brands daily Snapchat Discover channel. In 2016, she launched Cosmo Bites — which is now the official food and beverage vertical at Cosmopolitan. That same year, Danielle was named as a Rising Star in the digital media industry by FOLIO Magazine. Danielle got her start in digital media by launching the Her Campus chapter at Fairfield University in 2014, where she acted as Campus Correspondent for 2.5 years, before graduating with a degree in English and creative writing. She enjoys wine, food, and long walks through HomeGoods. Follow Danielle on Instagram!