When I left for college, I had to say goodbye to a lot of the people I loved. If I’m being completely honest, it was a lot harder than I thought it would be. Family and friends that were once so close by, are now hundreds of miles away. However, I am very thankful for the friends I have made while in college and the loving community I have now. It really isn’t easy to be on your own but you learn and grow as time goes on and it truly does get easier. But if I’ve learned anything while being in college, it’s that you can’t go out searching for love just anywhere. It’s getting chilly outside which means it’s cuffing season. Some of us may be in relationships already but for those of us who aren’t, it can be tempting to go out and find someone to be with this holiday season. I think it’s safe to say a lot of us are in love with the idea of love. It’s basically shoved in our faces all day long on social media. But stop to ask yourself, do I really need someone else?
Of course, it’s cute to be in a relationship, and it can bring you so much joy. However, loving yourself is possibly the best form of love out there. It took me a long time to learn to love myself and I think that maybe the reason I felt like I needed someone else in my life so that they could do it for me. But that just isn’t right. You need to learn to put yourself first and love every part of yourself. Self-love and self-care are essential to maintaining a healthy lifestyle in college.
Now I’m not gonna lie, I am definitely open to the idea of finding love in a relationship, but the difference is now I know that I don’t absolutely need it to exist. I realize that some people are exploding with self-confidence and self-love and that’s great, keep doing you girl! But for those of you that aren’t quite there yet, I hope this resonates with you. I don’t know each of your backstories or what you desire in terms of a romance but I do know that you don’t need someone else to feel whole.
Something essential to accepting this underrated phenomenon is the love and support from friends and family. Develop and maintain strong friendships because those can truly last forever. My family has always supported my dreams and because of that, I feel capable of almost anything. I may feel down at times but I always have these individuals to lift me up again. These people have shown me what love truly looks like.
If you’re still down about being lonely this season, I want you to know that it will happen someday but in its own time. You can’t force love and you shouldn’t have to. There are about 7 billion people in this world, and just because you don’t have someone now doesn’t mean you should give up hope or doubt your self-worth. Love yourself and everything that sets you apart from everyone else. I am still working on it, and it’s okay if you are too. Love is a beautiful thing that takes time and you need to put in the effort to form a healthy relationship with yourself. You don’t need a boo to have a great spooky season!