The day of chocolates, flowers, cards, hearts, teddy bears, balloons, and love will soon be upon us. But the problem is many young adults, including myself, have been feeling the loneliness, isolation, and FOMO of romantic relationships. Valentine’s day causes FOMO for singles because it is a holiday that markets itself for couples. Galentine’s day, the day before, is better because it’s a day that girls can spend time with each other. You don’t have to watch a romcom, you can watch any movie you want, or do any activity you like.
 I am generally an outgoing person, and not desperate for a relationship, but it can be emotionally draining to see that Valentine’s Day does not acknowledge single people. It also isn’t realistic because it gives the message that you “have” to look for your valentine. One of the messages is that you can find your romantic partner by February 14th. However, a lot of people say, it comes when you least expect it. As I have never been in a serious relationship, I’ve been told many times that love comes when you least expect it, and it does. You can say you are looking for someone, but it is never planned, as it is not easy to find, unlike friendship.Â
For movies, this is also why I am not into romantic Hallmark movies because they are not realistic, and they form more hopeless romantics. It takes time for relationships to develop, and a couple of days or weeks is not enough time to completely be serious about a relationship. Maybe a month or two of getting to know the person can work, but it is impossible to just form a serious relationship with a stranger in only a short amount of time.Â
Some couples can’t afford gifts or break up because they “must” buy gifts for someone. That is one of the reasons why some breakups happen around the holiday season. People are also pressured to find a significant other because it is cuffing season. The only thing that matters to me when I get into a relationship, is the time that we spend together. I am all for hangouts, fun recreational activities if we both are up for it, and conversation. But I’m not big on buying and receiving gifts, or a very expensive date night at a fancy restaurant because money and commercialism shouldn’t be used as the only reason to show you love someone. Â
This makes me concerned about the need for other people who also can feel pain on Valentine’s Day. The only “fun” thing that happens on Valentine’s Day is that children get to give out cards to other children at school in the classroom. And the day after because it’s when chocolates are 50% off. But there can be other ways to help the community on Valentine’s Day because February is also Heart Month, which promotes awareness of heart disease. Activities that can be done are to promote community wellness and to reduce heart disease, wear red, and donate blood or platelets (which may be scary, but it benefits a lot of patients who are in need, including patients with heart conditions).Â
I admit, I do have the guilty pleasure of owning a Valentine’s Tree. But that’s because I love the color red, and shiny Christmas-like decorations. Valentine’s day is associated with the color red, but I also have silver, and pink heart-shaped ornaments. It’s a winter tree that can be used to switch holidays. I have ornaments for St. Patrick’s Day, Easter, and the 4th of July. This tree is a symbol that represents that I am important. And that I am always reminded that there are shiny days ahead and that there are way more exciting things in life besides this Hallmark holiday. Self-love is always important, and the 14th of February can be a day to take care of yourself and forget all the stresses of FOMO. If you get into a relationship, you don’t have to necessarily love yourself before you love others. But you can always correct and get to know yourself and prioritize your mental health and wellbeing over unnecessary things or toxicity in life. Â