I feel as though I have to preface this article with this: I have, and probably always will, hate Valentine’s Day. While I think the idea of Valentine’s Day (showing the one you love how much you love them), is great, the obligatory feelings and need to “one-up” everyone else by having the most romantic night to prove you are the best and cutest couple kills the vibes, at least for me. I used to dislike Valentine’s Day more when I was single because it was always a day that made me feel extra lonely. Sure, my mom always gives me a gift on Valentine’s Day (Thanks mom!), but that’s really not the same as having an S/O. For a long time, being alone on Valentine’s Day was a trigger for my anxieties, and so I always associated the “holiday” with negative feelings. Ignoring the problematic aspects of Valentine’s Day (see: companies targeting insecurities for monetary gain), it’s nice to have someone show you that they love you (even though they should do that 365 days a year and not just on one single day).
That being said, however, not spending a day meant to celebrate love with the person you love is really hard. All day, I was wishing that I could be able to see my S/O when I got out of class or when I got home, but alas, long-distance and the calendar won this round. Valentine’s Day being on a Thursday, when I have class and my S/O works all day, really made it difficult to do anything. So in addition to the hour and a half drive in between us, we weren’t able to talk or text at all, barring a few 15 minute breaks, because we were both busy with our own schedules.
As hard as it was not seeing him, my boyfriend always comes through when I’m missing him, and we celebrated Valentine’s Day with a nice, hour-long, phone call before bed. As stressful as my day was, talking to my boyfriend made me remember all the good things that had happened throughout the day, and even though he couldn’t be there with me physically, he was able to bring a sense of calm into my life that I really needed. He reminded me that just because we couldn’t be together on Valentine’s Day, it didn’t mean that he didn’t love me, or that we wouldn’t get to celebrate being together.
So yes, celebrating your first Valentine’s Day together via a phone call at 10:30 PM isn’t ideal, what matters is that you are showing your partner how much you love them, and it doesn’t matter what you do to show that love. And, as much as I hate Valentine’s Day, not spending it with my boyfriend made me dislike the day even more because I just wanted to be with him, and I couldn’t. My biggest tip, however, is to schedule a time close to Valentine’s Day when you can celebrate or see each other, because it is hard to be apart when you’re seeing a ton of other couples out together doing cute things!