You saw your sweetheart talking to that person again, and you’re SO not happy. Are they flirting?
It’s okay to be a little jealous sometimes, but are you being unreasonable? Here’s how to calm yourself down and reassess the situation.
1. Accept the jealousy
It’s perfectly healthy to experience jealousy in small amounts; you love your partner and some part of you wants to keep them to yourself. You need to admit you’re feeling jealous before you can try to make yourself feel better.
2. Calm yourself down
Before you do anything crazy, step away from the situation. Walk away from whatever is making you feel jealous and distract yourself. Revisit your feelings later when you can be more rational.
3. Talk it out
When you’re ready, calmly talk to your partner about what you’re feeling. Do not attack, accuse or yell at them. Use “I” sentences rather than “You”, i.e. “I feel a little jealous when I see you talking to Jack. I’m not entirely sure why.” Do not say something like, “You make me jealous when you talk to Jack,” or “I saw you flirting the other day!” Help them to understand what you’re thinking.
4. Assess your feelings
After time passes, reflect on why you’re jealous. Is it because of your own insecurities? Is it because your partner has given you reason to believe they’d cheat on you? Think about the situation as objectively as possible, and determine whether it is you or the relationship that needs adjustment.
5. Asses your partner
Take some time to think about your partner. Are they kind and loving to you? Do they ever go out of their way to hurt you or make you feel jealous or less-than? If your answers are negative, it may be time to rethink the relationship.
Handle the situation as calmly as possible, and above all, take care of yourself!