IZZIE PRICE INTERVIEWS HOUSEMATES JOE HILL (DUS PRESIDENT) AND JORDAN SMITH (CHAD’S VP) FOR CAMPUS CELEBRITY:
How do you feel about being this week’s campus celebs?
Jordan: Being this week’s campus celeb is a great honour! As a music student, I have to desperately cling on to any possible hint of fame. I’m also available to play at weddings and business events!
Joe: A little bit disappointed we weren’t chosen already I guess.
If you could each be marooned on a desert island with anyone, who would you choose?
Jordan: My partner on a desert island would have to be my lovely college son Sam Rawcliffe, for being the most practical man I have ever met. Sam can build a working car using only standard office supplies and duct tape, so I’m pretty sure he could build us a boat in a couple of hours. Or at least a parasol to stop me from getting burned.
Joe: Anyone but Jordan.
If you had to compare eachother to an actual celebrity, who would you choose and why?
Jordan: Combine the emotional availability of Kristin Stewart with the blind ambition of Sarah Palin and we get Joe: a not-so-cuddly robot hell bent on world domination. Plus he has lady legs.
Joe: Rick Astley. When ‘Never Gonna Give You Up’ first came out everyone thought he was going to be a big deal, and then he just wasn’t. A true one hit wonder. And I resent the implication that neither of us are actual celebrities.
If you could choose a soundtrack for each other’s lives, what would you choose?
Jordan: Joe’s soundtrack would be the Imperial March from Star Wars. Joe quite likes the idea of being an evil space dictator; I can imagine him humming it to himself as he walks along the Bailey to give himself an ego-boost.
Joe: Jordan has been known to do a pretty good version of ‘Let It Go’ from Frozen. Fans can see his latest rendition on Facebook, and rumors are he’s covering the whole soundtrack in an upcoming album. Big hype.
What’s your best chat up line?
Jordan: Are you my little toe? Because I’d bang you against all my furniture. (Or if that one’s too risqué: Are you my appendix? Because I don’t know how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out.)
Joe: I can’t tell everyone, that would ruin the surprise.
As this is a Durham magazine, what are each of your favourite things about Durham?
Jordan: My favourite thing about Durham has to be the prices of drinks in the college bars. It’s dangerous.
Joe: The weather, I’ve always been a fan of bracing cold, sudden showers and high winds.
Describe each other in ten words?
Jordan: ‘I hope no-one finds out how nice I really am’
Joe: Good cook
Average flatmate
Big name
Small arms
Top guy