This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at DU chapter.
So for the first time in my college career I’m actually casually dating ONE guy exclusively and it’s got me thinking about the things that guys really actually notice and care about. So I kept asking this guy what he liked about me and what things he noticed. But then I realized that what guys care about most are the little things.
- Confidence without makeup on- They honestly don’t notice when you don’t wear makeup, but they do notice when you wear too much and look like a plastic Barbie doll.
- Crying and getting emotional around them about real stuff- not crying because of girl drama, but crying because you miss your family or your dog, crying because you’re scared of the future, or getting emotional about things that really matter is what they notice and care about. Now this isn’t to say go get emotional all the time, but occasionally it’s okay to show your true emotions around a guy you’re comfortable with!
- With number two being said, number three is TALKING to them about real stuff- life plans and goals, dreams and aspirations, fears and game plans. When you actually talk to a guy about more than just surface level things, they really feel like you care (and you should care) but it will also lend them to open up to you more and so you really get to know them, not just them on the surface.
- Cook for them (or with them if you’re brave) instead of going out all the time! An adventure in the kitchen can be one of the best dates ever. No need to dress up and spend money, instead going on a grocery run and spending an hour cooking gives you time to actually get to know each other and guys really notice when you’re just being you.
- Taking care of yourself on all levels. This could range from personal hygiene, to big responsibilities like maintaining your car/ apartment, to being financially stable. When a guy feels confident that you can take care of yourself it takes the pressure off of him to be your new “caretaker” or go to guy for problems. ** When I was fixing my own car, it actually got him going… apparently doing the little things like changing my own taillight was a turn on!
- Invite HIM to do things and plan dates for the two of you. Instead of just hopping in the car and letting him choose, plan a date and he will respond! Even better, pay for that date and change things up, it may make him a little uncomfortable but if you’re really wanting to get serious, splitting the bill sometimes will make him feel special and cared for. Guys deserve some pampering sometimes too!
- Be real and ACTIVE during sex. Don’t just lay there and let him do the work. Guys really notice (and like) when a girl takes the lead sometimes!
- Compliment him and notice small changes! I feel like us girls can sometimes get stuck in a rut and forget that guys like compliments too! We like compliments but how often do we give them? Noticing even the small things like him smelling good or wearing a nicer or new shirt and making it known that you notice is a big deal for guys. My guy says that when I notice small things it makes him feel important and that I actually pay attention to him and not just myself!
- Introduce him to your friends. In high school we brought boys home to our families for approval but in college our besties are the new stamp of approval. When I introduced my guy to my friends he told me it made him feel like I was actually serious about liking him, and that he wanted to get to know my friends. Integrating him slowly into your friend group is a huge sign to guys so be cautious- but if you’re ready it could push you two to the next level.
- And finally, asking him for help with certain things makes him feel needed and wanted. I know I said being independent could be a turn on for guys, but they also notice when you do need them. This isn’t to say make habit of it, but occasionally asking for help lets him know you want him around and that you’re admitting you can’t do life completely alone which can be very humbling for some people. Just be sure you don’t overdo it.