I’ve never been the type to have a big group of friends. Even throughout grade school, high school, and now college, I tend to have a small group of people that I spend most of my time with. I’ve always desired a larger group of friends, so when I found out about BumbleBFF, I was excited to jump on a chance to make more close friendships.
BumbleBFF is an offshoot of the dating app, Bumble, where girls have to send the first message to guys – I’ve heard it being referred to as the “feminist Tinder”. To access BumbleBFF, you download the original Bumble app and turn it on to BFF mode.
BumbleBFF works just like the rest of the dating apps, except it’s meant for making friends. You swipe right if you’re interested in getting to know one another as friends and swipe left if you’re not interested. If you both swipe right, you match and can then start a conversation.
One of the first things I noticed while swiping through potential future BFFs is that all of my possible choices were women. I thought this was an interesting decision on the part of BumbleBFF. On one hand, I have guy friends who I really value and that I’m close to. I definitely don’t believe that men and women can’t be friends (in fact I loathe the idea that people think this). I would have definitely liked if I was able to connect with guys as friends, or at least had been given the option to do so. However, I’m definitely still open to having more female friends, too.
When I first started swiping through people, I would carefully look through their profile. I would look at their pictures, read the descriptions they wrote for themselves, and try to make sound judgments. Do I have anything in common with her? Does she look like the kind of person who enjoys the same things I do? Does she look like the kind of person I would want to be friends with?
It made me start thinking. How could I judge if I want to be friends with somebody based off of five photos of them and a short biography? At least with hook-up apps, having pictures makes sense. Sexual attraction is a pretty huge part of dating and sex, and for many people, sexual attraction comes primarily from looks. But, does appearance have to be a major component of friendships?
Eventually, I just gave up on meticulously deciding if each person and I would make great BFFs and just swiped right on everybody. I ran out of people in a few minutes this way, unfortunately. I guess this is because the app isn’t too popular yet.
With those I matched with, usually a conversation complete with small talk would ensue. None of my conversations went past the awkward small talk phase. Eventually, my interest in BumbleBFF waned, and I forgot I had downloaded the app entirely.
BumbleBFF could be a great app for those who are truly dedicated to finding new friends, and would prefer to go through that selection online. However, I still prefer to meet friends in person where I can figure out if I connect with them right away, and where we don’t have the option of simply exiting out of the conversation at any given moment.