In a world where we are set on a constant search to try to find our perfect soul mate, sometimes either we or people we know end up in toxic relationships. Whether it is just an unhealthy lack of communication or an abusive relationship (physical, mental, sexual, or emotional), many of us know someone who has become trapped. Yet, in many circumstances, it often becomes hard to intervene and say something to your friend. Many people fear being wrong. Maybe the fight you overheard was just one fight. I mean, everyone fights with their significant other. But what if it’s not just a singular fight? If we keep allowing ourselves to make excuses, we are allowing our friends to be hurt and do nothing about it. Instead of becoming a bystander, here are some ways you can step in and save your friends from being in toxic relationships.
The first step is to address the situation. It is super important to not blame your friend though! One easy way that I found to address the situation without placing blame is to casually ask how your friend is doing. How is their relationship going? And if they will not say anything about it, it is okay to tell them you have noticed they are acting different lately, is everything okay? This will normally start a good dialogue and maybe lead to a good conversation where you can address the situation more head-on.
Once the dialogue is going, it is incredibly important to ensure that you do not blame your friend for anything relating to their relationship. The best way, at least in my experience, is to just sit there and listen. If they open up to you, they need someone who will just listen and understand how hurt they may be along with understanding their point of view of the situation. Your friend will may feel scared, anxious, or hurt along with many other emotions. Do not force them to open about their situation either. They will talk when they are ready, but remember even if they do not open to you, there are ways you can still help. If you see them fight, you can say to whoever the toxic person is, hey that’s not okay to talk to your significant other like that. You won’t hurt anyone’s feelings, and you might even show your friend you care about them.
All in all, you hold the power. If you see something, say something and step in. Do not allow yourself to be a bystander while your friend gets hurt. Their future may depend on you.