Trapped in My Own Head

Over the past couple of weeks, my mind has been controlling me. Yes, this is normal, and I am happy that my tired, college-student brain is still functioning, but my thoughts have been busy. I have slipped into the habit of allowing my mind to wander into dangerous depths. I lay in my bed worrying over scenarios that my mind seemed to create on its own… I had to do something about this; I could not let this new routine of overthinking control my emotional wellbeing. The feeling of becoming lost in my own mind is a journey that I did not want to partake in… these paths brought me to question the strength of my relationships, my confidence, and my comfort of positivity. 

My first step was to unplug. Scrolling through social media before bed has given my mind ideas and comparisons that I do not intentionally look for; they always creep into my head as I try to relax. I have realized that relaxing my mind has become a challenge; it’s always running, and I could not catch up. After goodnights texts and swiping out of my recently opened apps, I have tried to set my phone away from my reach. It usually takes my mind awhile to calm down and prepare for sleep, so I have steered myself away from grabbing my phone throughout the night. When my relaxed body is constantly accompanied by an awake mind, sleep is challenging. My new phone rule has helped significantly. 

Also, I have been reaching out to friends and family more often. I always catch myself wanting to chat with loved ones, but something in my subconscious mind has been stopping me recently. However, I have been making more of an effort to catch up with the people I care about. I was not aware of how much I need this, little reminders that we are all going to be okay. I tend to internalize my problems, meeting up to confront them in my head in bed at night… but I remind myself that communication is extremely important, and expressing my thoughts releases them from the cages of my mind. 

Finally, being active has helped me escape these unwarranted worries. Throughout most of my life, dance classes after school served as a way to release my worries without having to verbally express them. I have been trying to keep my body and mind motivated to stay active. Going to the gym gives me a task to focus on; I can escape my worries through movement. Also, keeping busy with movement during the day brings my mind to a state of rest much faster… I fall asleep easily when I feel the tiredness overwhelm my body. Ultimately, my mind is currently working to reach a healthier state, and I have found a few effective ways to keep myself out of the darkness.