1. The type who just wants nudes…
Unlike other dating sites like eHarmony, the name “Tinder” doesn’t exactly bring to mind images of storybook romance. The dating app is notorious for drawing in those who are looking for a hookup, nothing serious. While that’s totally fine (as long as both parties consent!), not everyone on the site wants to exchange pictures of their bits and pieces. But when you’re on Tinder, be prepared to come across some risqué profiles—and beware of putting your Snapchat name in your bio. Take it from me, creeps you didn’t match with will add you and proceed to send unending, unsolicited snaps of their junk. No thanks.
2. The type who you still see around campus, and it’s hella awkward
If you attend a small school, you’ll know the drill when it comes to walking past someone you matched with but never responded to, went on a date with, or even blocked. You might bend down to re-tie your shoes when you see them approach, or take a fake phone call from your mom when they’re behind you in line at the bookstore. Essentially, just act like you have no idea who they are, and consider the pros and cons of switching schools. Why does it feel like that one person is everywhere you go?
3. The type you had to block/unmatch
Sometimes people just won’t take even the most persistent “no” for an answer. Whether the person just isn’t the greatest conversationalist, lied about their age, or begins borderline harassing you for your phone number, you’ll likely wind up un-matching or blocking this user. Don’t feel guilty—stranger danger is real!
4. The type who’s virtually unrecognizable
To some extent, we’re all guilty of looking better on our social media accounts than we do in person. Blame FaceTune and that Valencia filter on Instagram. But some people you swipe right on will seriously show up to a date looking like a totally different human, and I’m not talking blonde instead of brunette—I’m talking a totally different face. If you’re worried about potential catfishers, let me suggest that you FaceTime the person before agreeing to a date. Of course looks don’t define a person, but lying about your appearance is still just that—lying. Not the best way to start a relationship if you ask me.
5. The type who ends up being a friend
Even if you didn’t download the app to find friends, you’ll probably meet some great people who you love to talk to, but don’t share a romantic connection with. Be open to the idea, and forget the haters who think ‘friendzoning’ is some kind of crime. I once went on a horrible date with a guy I met on Tinder. To be brief, he creepily watched me in the parking lot before sneaking up on me in the movie theater. Then he rattled off some snide comments during Find Dory before I swerved on his attempt to kiss me. Later that night, when I suggested that we should just be friends, he offered a misogynistic quip: “Guys and girls can’t just be friends.” Needless to say, that’s a load of B.S., and I have several guy friends who I talk to regularly who I matched with on the app.
6. The type you never contact
If your Tinder profile is poppin’, first of all, go you. Second, you probably won’t have the time, energy, or interest in actually reaching out to every single match. Maybe you don’t want to be the one to make the first move or maybe you’re too wrapped up in talking to the other matches to even worry about the ones you haven’t heard from yet. In the end, it’s just impossible to devote meaningful time to every single match, but don’t sweat it.
7. The type who makes you question why you ever swiped right
This definitely happened to me during my eighteen or so months on the app. Drunkenly swiping or letting your friends take over your profile can definitely lead to some questionable matches. Thank God for the un-match button.
8. The type who makes for a good story, and nothing else
That one dude who used an expired military license to get a discount on your movie tickets, bragged about selling weed to kids, lied about being in school, and whined about his milkshake getting soggy? Yeah, he may have ruined your Valentine’s Day, but damn he made for a good essay.
9. The type who plays you like a fool
Some people will go through a hell of a lot of trouble to sweep you off your feet, and royally disappoint you. My freshman year, I matched with a guy who seemed too good to be true: handsome, funny, sweet, and smart. We talked for nearly a year, and he even told me he was in love with me. Finally, when he was in the same state as me, we decided to meet up for a real date. After I called off work, drove two hours to his town, and waited an additional two hours for him to show up to the restaurant, he and I ate pancakes and were actually hitting it off. Because we wanted more time together, we decided to get a hotel room, which he paid for, and then planned to see a movie later that same night. Though I’m not proud of it, he and I had sex as soon as we walked inside the hotel room. At that point, I felt like I’d known him for so long, even if we’d only just met in person an hour earlier. I thought he cared about me. When it was over, he got a call from his dad, and told me he needed me to drive him back home so he could do some chores. He promised he’d come back. And so I drove him home, and he hopped out of the car without so much as a kiss goodbye. And I waited at the hotel for him, watching TV alone, until he texted me that he had to stay home. I went downstairs, returned the key to the front desk without asking for a refund, and drove back home with dry eyes. That same week, I discovered that he had a girlfriend.
10. The type you fall in love with
If after all of these types of matches, you meet someone who seems different, who treats you with respect and listens to you, don’t let them go. My boyfriend and I have been together for nine months now, which means, yes, it’s 100% possible to find a loving relationship on Tinder. I think one of the biggest bumps in the road users encounter is the mismatch in intentions. Just ask the other person why they’re on the app, and if that reason aligns with yours, you’ll probably fair a lot better than I did in my early months on the app. Keep on swiping!