2020. The entire world mourned the loss of a whole year, falling prey to a pandemic that brought all kinds of power and wealth to their feet. We longed for the touch of other human beings, to meet our friends, to be able to go out, but above all, we longed for normalcy. From the comforts of my home, I witnessed devastating news of the poor perishing while returning home amidst a hasty lockdown in India – not even worthy of being counted as a pandemic statistic.
A little over a year down the line, a time we hoped and planned for in the past, the COVID-19 crisis has come crashing down upon India like no other catastrophe ever could. And with it, accompany the psychological perils of the disease. As the cases skyrocketed towards the end of March in 2021, so did the collective anxieties of not just those affected, but everyone around them.
The pressure of adapting to the paranoia and the ‘new normal’ had been relentless throughout 2020, no matter which part of the world one lived in. The gravity of the current situation, however, is something that could have been avoided.
The recent disaster which has hit India has forced people to tirelessly work towards either looking for resources for people or struggling to even get by. This has made experts take a harder look at people’s lifestyles, especially on managing mental health in times as testing as these. The question of the physical impact of COVID-19 alone has been so severe, that even the staunchest mental health advocates have discounted the somatic consequences that have resulted from the stress, hopelessness, and pure mental exhaustion that the pandemic brings with it.
It’s easy to understand why mental health is still taking a backseat among the list of concerns for people, given the urgent needs are far more tangible to address. But this is what makes it all the more important for people to examine the overwhelming toll their surroundings are taking on their minds, which is culminating in a number of physical ailments.
Dealing with grief has been a significant issue during these times. Everyone I know is losing someone almost every other day. Sometimes it feels almost surreal that we are expected to carry on with life as it is. The pretense, however, often proves to be the easier alternative than having to cope with news that’s bound to break your spirits. Those of us who have the privilege to take a break, are filled with immense guilt of even having that option﹣all the while grieving not just the lives we lost, but the loss of our nation altogether.
Research has shown the heartbreakingly adverse impact that day-long shifts in the Covid wards have taken over healthcare workers; that working ambulances twenty-four-seven have taken on the paramedics; and most importantly the cremation and burial of thousands of bodies each day has taken over crematorium and cemetery workers – a majority of whom belong to the Dalit-Bahujan-Adivasi communities.
There are still people out there doing groundbreaking work against all odds to ensure that this unreal reality doesn’t stunt us forever. Resources for mental health support are being shared, but they are unfortunately not accessible to enough people. Yet, the spirit of humanity has brought together children as young as twelve scouring the internet for resources. It has pushed the final year student in college to abandon all his academic anxieties, mourn his father’s loss for a week and then continue to hold it together for his mother – not knowing how to break the news to her when there’s no guarantee that she will even make it.
While it’s understandable that people want to be good Samaritans and use their platform and their means to help whoever they can, they need to realize that this burden is not theirs to carry. The accountability that lies with the government and the blatant complacency in the face of a medical emergency has been another constant source of tension among all of those bearing the brunt of the hit. While that is a whole other conversation, the current need of the hour is to preserve our own mental well-being, no matter how bleak it seems.
It feels futile to say we are in this together, because we really are not. The cracks in the system and the class and caste inequalities have been exposed more than ever in light of recent events. But that’s what makes it even more exigent to take charge and do something about what we can control, in any capacity at all.
It is important to take a step back, to break the cycle of guilt and grief from taking over our entire lives. Step one in this journey is to acknowledge that we do not live in normal times. That one shouldn’t have to constantly deal with such desolation. That in the spirit of helping out and going on, to support those who are left to fend for themselves, it’s extremely essential to take care of ourselves first.
We must set boundaries on how much we wish to involve ourselves and how to process our own feelings. It’s of paramount importance to not invalidate our emotions for the sake of being valuable in others’ time of need. This is the major theme plaguing the conversation around mental health right now after grief. Only after addressing the existence of a problem can we set out to look for solutions. Only then can we begin to bargain for the peace we so desperately need these days, even if it lasts a single minute.
Reach out, first and foremost to yourselves, then maybe to a pen and a paper, and maybe even a loved one or someone you trust if possible.
This too shall pass!
Listed below are a few organizations/initiatives working to provide free or affordable mental health care for frontline workers and others:
- One Future India is sponsoring therapy for frontline workers, including journalists (form to access)
- CSR (Center for Social Research) India’s curated set of resources.
- Yuvaa’s curated set of resources (most offer free/subsidised rates)