I remember thinking about the kind of college I wanted to be in, the dreams of a cool campus, the fun, the experience, and the friends I’ll make. Amidst this, an all-girls college never made it to the list of my dream colleges, but I somehow ended up exactly where I swore I would never go. Quite honestly, there was an apprehension about not having a co-ed environment and having just girls, which seems slightly odd since every friendship I’ve ever had or I continue to have is with a girl. This apprehension ultimately did stem from my prejudices and hearsay about the possible restrictions a girls’ college may have and too often hearing from seniors or peers about how boring it gets to be in one. But my determination to not get into a girl’s college seems childish now, considering I’ve had a fair share of both good and bad experiences in my life at college.
My unwillingness also lay deeply embedded in the stereotype that a girl’s college would lack the ‘normal’ campus experience I was eager to have and that it was a lesser of the two. Apart from the positives of the ‘fashion being great’ and the ‘friendships being strong,’ a common stereotype most people believed to be was the lack of a ‘real-world’ experience.
This real-world experience could simply mean diversity. On one hand, according to some, interaction with all gender identities may become somewhat less and it may become a valid reason for many to have second thoughts about only girls’ college. But there is also a need to realize that gender does not exist just in binaries and that you not only interact with cishet women but with students of various gender identities.
However, for many, the same environment is seen as ideal from the perspective of safety and to discredit such experiences and opinions would be looking at the concern from a single viewpoint. If lack of diversity is an issue, empowerment could be an advantage. Certainly, being in a girl’s college gives us the possibility of growth, to learn in a manner that allows us to reflect, think and process our prejudices and stereotypes that develop through constant patriarchal conditioning. There are shared experiences and collective resistance to discrimination, and we learn to support each other in times of distress. The recent solidarity shown by the students of Delhi University’s Indraprastha College for Women (IPCW) against the compromise of their safety and rights stands as a staunch example of the unity that is fostered in these three years.
Now that I ponder, my experiences of college life are not different from others. I laugh at the same memes, have similar anxieties, pine over lost attendance, make similar memories and befriend equally incredible people. Different people think, adapt, and learn differently, so my reasons for choosing or rejecting a particular college might be vastly different from others. I can neither choose for you nor say what is best for you, but merely navigate the existence of supposed differences in reality. If we widen our perceptions and go in depth into what lies beyond a superficial understanding of certain realities, we would be able to come out of socially created hierarchies. Your dream college might be the one with the best societies, a great faculty, a better infrastructure, and even a women’s college.