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Coping With Grief: The Sight Of Parents Growing Old

The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Delhi North chapter.

With each passing day, my heart wrenches seeing my parents grow older. The images of a vivaciously young couple now appear gradually fading into grey. It’s an inescapable and challenging feeling.

The hardest part of growing up? For me, it has to be watching my parents grow older. There’s this sudden realization that all things are finite and there’s an end to everything. Every time I think about this, the reality hits even harder. I share a close relationship with my parents. Even today, as I am about to graduate, I am still that little girl who wants her parents to be around her. As I’m growing up, I have come to terms with the fact that at some point, I would have to leave my parents behind. Moving out in search of better jobs or career opportunities makes it a little burdensome to reconnect with our parents.

During my teens, I used to assume that I was the ‘best’ decision-maker for myself and didn’t require any opinions from my parents. The probable reasons for this were peer pressure and the quest to forge my own identity. I certainly wanted to do things on my own and set an image in front of my friends. However, my parents did an excellent job in parenting as they let me try out new things and become the ‘main character’ of my life. I’m guilty of making certain failed decisions, but this experience inculcated valuable lessons in me.

When I wake up in the morning, I see my father reading the newspaper with his spectacles on and my mother preparing breakfast while managing her knee pain. Even though a daily routine, I perceive a sense of beauty in this morning scene. My dad now appears frail and walks a bit slower than he did before, but never did he complain about being tired. He’s such a hero, and so is my mom. Despite working 24/7, she still has the energy to make chapatis (a type of flatbread consumed in India) and continues to be the most beautiful woman on earth. I wonder how are they so strong? They are the real superheroes!

As people grow up, their behavior gradually becomes similar to that of a child. This can be majorly seen in the elderly when they start to behave like kids. The traits of being strong and fearless yet soft and warm can be seen in parents. This rare combination of two contrasting yet integral characteristics makes them parents. However, parents are humans, they can go through lows too. A fragile parent is a parent who has unresolved health issues, whether mental or physical. If a child grows up with a parent who is not in a healthy place, they may become accustomed to abnormal behaviors. This, in turn, might affect the child in the long run. In such situations, it’s recommended to seek professional help.

The sight of seeing my parents grow older cuts my heart into pieces. Nonetheless, this is the cycle of life, and as humans, all we can do is embrace it. We have to live with it. I have the surreal blessing to celebrate the richness of the relationship with my parents and I’m grateful for it. Aging has to happen; all we can do is make it special for our parents. They are waiting for us to succeed; they are waiting for D-day! Being a caregiver is an unsaid duty of any child. My parents don’t leave any stone unturned for my well-being. Thus, giving them love, compassion, respect, security, and affection is the best we can do as their kids. Making their life brighter, their mind happier, and their body healthier is the goal. Spending more time with them, ensuring they let us know what they love. They have spent their entire lives for us, and now it’s our turn to give them all we have. Love your parents. We’re so busy working on us that we tend to forget that they’re waiting for us at home. Having a meal with them at least once a day, taking them out for shopping or movie dates, bringing them gifts, and celebrating minor victories can go a long way. Their eyes are longing for us. Making them happy in this ever-changing and mysterious world should be the priority in the symphony of the wondrous cycle of life.

Aarzoo Rohilla, is a writer at HerCampus Delhi North. Being a political science enthusiast, she prefers to dwell in arenas which certainly pose an impact on the society from the lens of politics. Beyond this, she pens down about real life experiences and worthy happenings from the surrounding. Aarzoo is currently majoring in Political Science from Indraprastha College For Women, University of Delhi with minor in psychology. She possesses deep rooted inclination towards these subjects. She has been part of NGO’s wherein she has worked closely for the social cause. Being a part of an internship at Fortis Hospital for mental health, she has worked for pushing away mental health stigma. In her leisure time, she is usually engaged in penning her diary. She firmly believes that “you’re one of a kind”. As one goes by her name which translates to desire, she’s striving to fulfill them. Aarzoo enjoys spending time with her dog and can never say no to dance.