PDA – How much is TOO much?

Public display of affection—whether it’s linking arms, holding hands, a quick peck on the lips or cheek, or a full-on make-out session—can be a sweet way to show love. But let’s be real, it’s always good to be mindful of those around you. As someone who’s been single for the past three years, the most PDA I’ve been involved in is linking arms or holding hands with the girls on a night out—can you blame me? Dublin winters are freezing! I’ll be sharing my thoughts and opinions on PDA, from the cute and wholesome to the downright excessive. 

The wise-ish words from Tati Westbrook’s ‘Bye Sister’- ‘TIME AND PLACE’ 

There’s nothing wrong with a bit of affection, but context matters. Five pornstar martinis in and a handsome Dicey’s Garden prince charming? A cheeky kiss at the bar is totes fair game. But a full make-out session on a lunch date in front of a poor family in public?! Absolutely not. expand it. A good way to gauge whether the time and place are right is to put yourself in someone else’s shoes. Imagine you’re sitting in a café, on public transport, or even just walking down the street—how would you feel if another couple were engaging in the same level of PDA? Does it feel appropriate for the setting, or is it veering into please-get-a-room territory? Context is everything. A little hand-holding or a quick kiss is one thing, but intense make-out sessions in the middle of a crowded space can make even the most laid-back people feel like awkward bystanders. And let’s not forget the ultimate test—what if your parents, boss, or even a teacher happened to walk by at that exact moment? If the thought alone makes you cringe, it’s probably a sign to tone it down! 

Which PDA is actually appropriate? 

Holding hands, linking arms or arm around the shoulder- wholesome af. Honestly, the only negativity I feel about this is pure jealousy. Kiss on the cheek- quite cutesy! It’s even a greeting and social norm in countries such as Spain, France and Italy. A peck is totally fine, just keep it brief. Quick and subtle? Adorable. Lingering and dramatic? Please, spare us all. Kissing with tongue? Save it for the bar, the club, or better yet, the bedroom. The sober-minded public really don’t need front-row seats to that. And if we’re going as far as anything below the belt in public, at this point, you’re not just making a scene—you’re humiliating yourself and breaking the law. Please, have some dignity. 

Where Do We Draw the Line? 

PDA is one of those things that people either find adorable or absolutely unbearable. In some cultures, even holding hands in public is frowned upon, while in others, couples practically merge into one person on public transport. Personally, I think there’s a fine line between sweet and cringeworthy. A quick kiss? Cute. A full-on snog in the middle of a packed café? Maybe save that for later. But hey, that’s just me—some people love a good public love-fest, and fair play to them.

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