I Sat Through Two and Half Hours of Dune So I Can Tell You To Watch It

I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer.

With one of the most talked-about movies of the year finally in cinemas, it’s only natural that I went to see it and talked to you all about it.

Dune stars Hollywood’s gorgeous string bean Timothée Chalamet along with a stellar cast consisting of the likes of Oscar Isaac, Josh Brolin, Jason Mamoa, Rebecca Ferguson, and the queen herself Zendaya.

Now listen, I walked into this movie completely clueless. I mean it. I hadn’t a single clue about anything going into it and spent the entire journey to the cinema asking my poor uncle for a bit of background information so I wouldn’t be completely lost. This is basically the gist.

It’s all set in the future many moons after there’s been a complete outlaw of computers, (I know, what a travesty) and our leading man Timothée plays Paul Atreides, the son of Duke Atreides, patriarch of House Atreides who are members of the Noble Houses of the Landsraad. They live on a planet called Caladan with Paul’s mother Jessica who is a Bene Gesserit, a member of a political and concubine sisterhood trained in the use of the persuasive ‘Voice.’

The whole story basically begins when House Harkonnen, another noble house who are the baddies, is pushed off the desert planet Arrakis after ruling there for 80 years and controlling the spice trade. House Atreides is sent to Arrakis by the Emperor to fix the spice trade and bring order between the people of Arrakis and the Fremen, the desert people who consider Arrakis their home.

I am going to say it once only, Spice is so bloody important to the whole story. Spice is a drug and powder used in space travel, and for getting hella high, that is only found on Arrakis, so for years, the planet has been pillaged by the CHOAM Company for the spice. Spice means everything.

I must admit, I thought I was going to spend the movie bored out of my brain and confused because I hadn’t any idea about anything. It was fine for my uncle; he’d read the books when he was a teenager and seen the old film. 

The movie did a great job of explaining things to new viewers who may not have had any previous experience with the franchise and were new to it because of a certain lanky boy. Yes, I’m calling myself out. You know I’d never lie to you.

The cast is immaculate. I was so out of the loop with the movie. All I knew was that Timothée, we’re on a first-name basis at this stage, and Zendaya were in it. Then of course I had the wind knocked out of me and my soul in the iSense screen of my local cinema when I saw Oscar Isaac. Then Josh Brolin. Then Jason Mamoa. I truly felt my brain short-circuiting at the acting in this movie. I had a certain expectation because of the reputation Timothée has but I did not expect the rest of the cast to carry the way they did. This movie deserves all the awards.

I’m not the only one who’s going to say it but dear God, please give Timothée Chalamet an Oscar. His acting in this movie is absolutely incredible. He managed to make one scene both extremely pained and unbelievably erotic. For me, that says it all. What can I say? The man has range.

All jokes aside, it was an incredible movie. Say what you want about Zendaya’s screen time, yes, she only has 7 minutes of screen time which is shockingly criminal, but the story, acting, effects and everything worked so beautifully to reignite the fire of this story from 1965. Yes, this story is literally the same age as my uncle.

The script had to be one of my favourites of any movie I’ve ever seen. I’ve started reading the book and the script thankfully stays very true to the essence of the original story. I still have full-body chills from when Rebecca Ferguson recited the startlingly haunting Litany Against Fear and am definitely putting a print of it on my wall.

So, my takeaway from this movie was I will be completely restless until October 2023 and we get Part Two. And I will be feral when I see Timothée Chalamet as Paul Atreides once again.

I mean it. Feral

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