“God I need a boyfriend!”
I don’t think there is a single woman alive who has not uttered these words at some point in her life. Why? It seems we that we have been programmed to think that a relationship is the little pot of gold through which eternal happiness is found. Sure a relationship may enrich what is an already happy life. However, it’s often when we are at our lowest, feeling lonely and vulnerable that our minds begin to wander off and lust after our one true love.
The truth is you don’t need a relationship. You are strong all on your own. Whether you are in school or out working, you are actively trying to better yourself. You are not waiting for the perfect life to be handed to you on a silver platter or the perfect partner to come along and make all your dreams come true. You are giving yourself a platform upon which to build your future and that is something to be proud of.
You may wish you had someone to cosy up with in front of the fire or to take you on a date to that new rom-com in the cinema, but they’re chic flicks for a reason, so get your girls round and go wild! Every one of you has amazing friends who will go out and get drunk with you one night and stay in and have a fat night with you the next. Friends that love you and would do anything for you. So appreciate them, they will help you find your happiness.
If you are someone who gets insecure about your appearance and think that having someone to tell you that you look beautiful everyday would fix it, then I’m sorry but it’s time to think again. Nobody can fix your insecurities but you. Your mother couldn’t, when on your first day of school she told you that you looked pretty. Your friends couldn’t when they complimented you on your outfit at your first teenage disco.
It is up to you to get yourself in front of your mirror and tell yourself that you look damn good and it is up to you to start to believe it. Trust me, once you do, that’s when you’ll really start to feel happy.
You see your happiness does not depend on other people and that’s something that we should be beyond grateful for. To give someone else the power to control how you feel would remove any semblance of power that we have on our own destiny.
So go out in the world, experience new things, make new friends and learn to love you for you. Once you do all that, you’ll have found your happiness. You’ll be killing it all on your own.
Bottom line you need to love your life before you can share it. So be single and be happy.
Photo by Evan Kirby on Unsplash