Coming out, two simple words that mean so much to so many people, a phrase that allows a person to feel free and yet is a terrifying step of acceptance.
The metaphor coming out is the process of self discovering that you are LGBTQI+ and feeling comfortable with oneself to disclose how you identify to others.
There is no right or wrong way to come out, and it is entirely up to the individual on how they want to share this personal information.
‘Keep it to a select few at the start, people you trust and come to terms with it yourself’ said Ellen Murphy (21), who identifies as lesbian.
‘The hardest part of coming out is coming out to yourself and once you’ve done that you can take it from there’.
Coming out is and should not be about other people, you do not need to rush this process, it can take days, weeks or months to accept your feelings. Allow yourself to take time and understand what you need or want.
‘Never feel you should come out, you don’t have to come out to certain people’ said Murphy.
If you do feel ready to come out, it is important to assess your safety within your environment and to ensure that you are prepared for whatever the outcome.
Cian McGuire, a final year UCD student, who identifies as gay said ‘I’m on two sides about this, on one hand I think the younger you come out the better for your mental health but then obviously I think coming out during school can be dangerous.’
‘You have to assess how you think your family will take it so definitely you wait until you feel like you’re safe.’
Coming out an action although bizarre and frustrating especially in the year 2021, allows your voice to be heard in a hetero normative society and gives power to your difference.
‘A good thing to realise is that coming out isn’t a thing you just do once, it’s something you have to keep doing again and again’ said McGuire
‘You have to keep doing it for the rest of your life and just to get use to that and be ok with that’
Coming out, although freeing is also scary, and all the advice in the world will not help you unless you’re ready to hear it.
Trust your gut and be kind to yourself.