Often times when I tell people I have never had a boyfriend they are usually very perplexed and even sometimes quite judgmental. I often see my friends settling too quickly into relationships only to end up hurt and confused when it doesn’t work out. I’ve heard girls say how much better their life would be if they had a boyfriend and how lonely they are without one. Unfortunately, I’m not quite sure if having a boyfriend would fix these problems. I think self love is important for any relationship to work and it's problematic that people think a romantic partner is supposed to “complete” you.
Many people often feel pressure to date or have someone in their life because everyone else around them does. Though people often find it so strange that I am so content in my life without being in a relationship or trying to pursue one, I feel everyone should embrace being single and wait for the right opportunity or moment in their lives to pursue a relationship. Here are some of my favorite perks of being single:
1. I have watched myself grow so much into the person I have become today and my level of confidence and assurance in who I am is not something I think I would have reached with having a boyfriend.
2. My favorite part is being able to spend every single day with my friends and not worrying about having to balance that time with a significant other.
3. I'm allowed to be selfish with myself and do what I want which only allows me to figure out the person I am. Afterall, if I don't love myself first there is no way I can expect another person to love me or teach them how. By working on myself I'm actually being responsible and preparing for a successful relationship.
4. I know quite a few people that regularly must confirm with their significant other before attending a party or going out with friends, which is something I am happy I do not have to do, espcially when my parents don't even feel the need to regulate or control what I do.
Don’t get me wrong, having a relationship with someone you truly love is something incredible and the thought of having that someday seems awesome. I have many friends in relationships that are extremely happy and I hope to have that when I’m ready. I see them supporting each other, sharing the most exciting moments in their lives with one another and just having a sense of security. It's exciting to think about having someone who is on your side all of the time. However, I see nothing wrong with genuinely being complacent with where I am in life and you shouldn't either.
Especially with holidays like Valentine’s Day, many people make themselves feel so miserable when they do not have a date or get a bouquet of roses. It’s important to realize that Valentine’s Day is not only for spending time with or money on a romantic partner but also family,friends, or yourself can be celebrated as well. You never need a significant other to celebrate a day of love.
I leave you with a quote from our former first lady and forever my inspiration, Michelle Obama, “If I had worried about who liked me and who thought I was cute when I was your age, I wouldn’t be married to the president of the United States.” #queen