Women Of Words: Things That Just Feel Feminist

Feminism in daily practice is a beautiful culmination of love, rage, care, and mindfulness that surpasses what most people feel when they think of the word “feminist”. The close-minded modern adaptation of feminism in a nutshell has become negatively connotated with a passive-aggressive ignorance, where women are laughed at for even bringing up the word. Firsthand, I have experienced that many women’s sheer relationship with this word has deferred them to passivity in situations where overt instances of ignorance have been left unrefuted. In many ways, we as women are unintentionally furthering the misogyny that we have so desperately tried to combat. Words have a proven power, where words become more provocative if left unclaimed. Historically, our intentions surrounding words become cyclical, locked in stagnation until they can either be rescued or stolen again. 

In nature, we as women are taught to second-guess and analyze the things that make us feel powerful. If something is declared “feminine” in the English language, it is objectified or deferred to as weak. If something is declared “masculine”, it is rewarded for it’s heroism or intellect. The real reason we must examine the roots of our language patterns is that this clear division between ourselves and our abilities makes a subconscious impact on how we treat others, and more importantly, ourselves. Our definitions of life and the way we perceive our role in the grander scheme of things are considerable philosophical questions. Since the dawn of the feminist movement in 1848, we have been making mistakes. By resenting women of color from the first waves of this movement, we have selfishly overlooked the ways in which we are strongest together. We must not let the feminist movement become antique, in 2026 we currently reside in the newest wave of feminism, characterized by reparations. Lifted on the backs of women who have sacrificed, it would be a disservice to change to forget our roots. Uncharacteristic to some revolutions, we are not in a physical war to enact chance. More similarly to intellectual movements of change, we are at war with deeply enforced institutional injustices. Strengthening our bonds of commonality as women continue to be key in revealing the many layers of fundamental injustices. 

So, in that case, how can we really be sure what is feminist or not? Instead of directly answering this question, I deferred to some of my favorite women in my life. My question for them summed up to, “What are some things/actions/places that just ‘feel’ feminist to you?” In my mind, the ambiguity of this question reaches to a place that allows your answer to mean something as mundane or as grand as you wish it to be. Here were some of the responses I got; starting from the woman with admirable longevity, of 91 years, my grandmother. 

Grandma Jane briefly notes that the most impactful thing in her life was the women she practiced rug hooking with, a group of women she spent decades getting to know both creatively and intellectually. Simultaneously, she also mentions her experience in college, where, for the first time, she witnessed women freely speaking their minds with equally empowered women. When she revisits this time in her life, it binds the passing of time to the reality that the life-changing privilege of women belonging in higher education is something that was quite recent. From this point, I take away the principle of precedence. 

For my wonderful and wise mom, her answer was, “The first thing that comes to mind is being a single mom. Another, women who pursue higher education, especially master’s and doctorates. Oh, and I’d add that I wear a ring I bought myself on my wedding ring finger – I married myself in 2009!” I love this answer specifically because it highlights the clear difference between her and her mother’s answer, independence. This key element of autonomy in her answer bridges the gap intergenerationally, while still paying respect to the thematic importance of higher education. In between these strides of progress, stigmas behind single parenting and achievements of self-sufficiency achieved a great deal, but continue to be challenged. From this conversation, I take away the principle of perseverance. 

Finally, I asked four of my close friends, who are all around my age, the same question. Their answers ranged from actresses, self-care, libraries, to acts of compassion. My favorite answer of these came from my lovely friend Landa, who simply said, 

“The act of saying no”

Sit with that for a moment. In a world where women are still fighting for the right to be believed, the act of saying no is more courageous than ever before. From minor circumstances and in the highest public offices in the country, women have stepped into their power to tackle “no” in every capacity of the word. From the matriarchal responses of my grandmother to my mom, and ultimately to my friends, they have each disguised a clever theme in which all feminists can relate. In our creative and f*cked up world, we must hold people close and words closer. The curation of feminist practice is no accident, and neither are these answers. Feminism surrounds and uplifts, feminism is nature and art and culture, and the ways in which we believe ourselves to be worthy of the abundance of reciprocity. 

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