With Valentine’s day quickly approaching, love is in the air and so is the stress of planning the perfect date night. Couples all over the world will be scrambling to put together the best, most romantic night that they can come up with. Though I love the fact that as a society we value celebrating this holiday and making grand romantic gestures, love and relationships should be celebrated more regularly. It’s important for couples to continue to “date” each other to build or strengthen happy and healthy relationship habits.
Planning regular dates with your partner not only gives you something to look forward to, but also gives you time to strengthen your emotional and physical connection to one other. Long-term couples are notorious for not making time to date each other. A report from the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia and the Wheatley Institute reported that “Over half (52%) of husbands and wives reported ‘never’ or rarely going out on dates.” This number is shockingly high for a society that values love, relationships, and social outings. This report also mentions that regularly dating your partner is linked to a happier and more stable relationship.
So what is holding couples back from regular date nights? There could be a variety of factors such as financial reasons or lack of time. While these are both valid explanations, regularly scheduled dates don’t have to be extravagant, like a Valentine’s Day date night. Dating your partner regularly could mean walking around your favorite park or making drinks and sitting on your patio playing a card game. Couples who see each other frequently get stuck in their day-to-day routines and forget to have planned time with each other. Life gets busy and things come up, but there is always time for you to spend with your partner. Set aside one night a month and cook a new meal together, walk around the mall or go see a new movie. Be intentional about your time with them; it doesn’t have to be extreme, it just has to be meaningful. If you can’t find the time, make it.
Making time to spend with your significant other proves to them that they are a priority to you. We all know that it feels so good when someone wants to spend time with you. Devoting time to each other allows you to catch up on one another’s lives and once again, strengthen your connection. Long story short, going on dates and spending one-on-one time with your significant other does wonders for your relationship. Even if you feel as though your relationship is stable and healthy as is, it doesn’t hurt to try to date your partner more regularly. Couples who report going on dates regularly are 14-15% more likely to report being “very happy” in their relationship. Like dating, flirting increases appreciation of your partner, sparks intimate conversations, and leads to happier experiences in relationships.
Speaking on behalf of the girlfriends out there, going on dates with your partner feels so special. I love knowing that my boyfriend wants to be with me and that he can set aside time to focus on our relationship. I find that the less time I spend with my boyfriend, the more irritable I become with him and I feel lonely despite the fact that I still have other amazing friends. With all of this being said, there is a fine line of missing your significant other and being unable to be apart from them. One of the most important things you can do for the sake of your relationship is to communicate your expectations on how often you need to spend with them to maintain a healthy relationship. Find a way to date your partner that works for both of you. It takes two committed partners to make relationships work successfully.
So, let this article serve as your reminder to ask your partner on a date. Make it work, whatever that means for you. Take a step towards making your relationship happier and more stable in the long run. Don’t get lost in feeling comfortable with your connection. Remember that the chase doesn’t end when you finally begin your relationship; you must continue to show your love. And while you’re at it, ask your partner to be your Valentine–I can guarantee that they will love it and will feel so special.