I went through sorority rush twice at the University of Colorado Boulder, and both times I did not get a bid. For a while, I thought that would ruin my college experience.
Recruitment at Boulder lasts four days. It starts with a 3-minute video where you introduce yourself and explain why you want to be involved in Greek life. Then, the in-person rounds: philanthropy, sisterhood, preference, and finally, bid day.
I made it through the preference round but got a call on bid day telling me not to show up because, unfortunately, I did not get a bid. I was crushed. Going to a school across the country, I naturally wanted to experience sorority life. To me, it was an opportunity to meet a large group of girls with something in common.
During the process, I started bonding with girls on my dorm floor — getting ready together, comparing schedules, and sharing excitement about where we might end up. After not receiving a bid, watching my friends celebrate the festivities of Bid day, I felt labeled, as if everyone was looking at me trying to figure out why I wasn’t chosen.
I couldn’t help but question myself. Was I too awkward? Not pretty enough? What made me different from those who have received a bid? It was a rough introduction to college, watching everyone become involved in something I had no choice but to sit out from. It felt like the end of the world, but this is Boulder, not Alabama. While I felt left out from mixers and formals, it never stopped me from going to a party or doing other things.
Sophomore year, I tried again. But this time, I didn’t even make it to preference night. The self doubt returned and I once again started a new year with rejection. I began to nit pick, searching for a reason why. Was my makeup not right? Maybe it was my outfits? Was my hair frizzy? Was I being weird? Did I say the wrong things?
But when you think about it, in 2023 and 2024, over 1500 girls registered for sorority recruitment at Boulder. With nine sororities and pledge classes being only 150-200 people, it becomes less personal and more logistical, not reflecting on who you are as a person.
Sororities can be wonderful — they offer philanthropy opportunities and social events. But, they are far from being key to a great college experience. Writing this as a junior, the thought of my failed rush attempts feel insanely irrelevant to who I am now and my current college experience.
I now live with four amazing girls, two who are in sororities and two who are not. I work for the football team under Coach Video where I get to meet great people and I am involved in multiple clubs: Best Buddies, Sko Buff Sports and Her Campus.
Making friends comes naturally throughout college, not through sharing the same letters. Boulder is not “Greek life or no life.” Not being in a sorority hasn’t affected me in any way. I love my friends in sororities, but it can also be bittersweet and involve drama that is way too reminiscent of high school and immaturity.
Honestly, I wish someone had reassured me freshman year that it all worked out. Looking back, I know it happened for a reason. I would never trade where I am now for a spot in sorority life. By junior year, if not earlier, it becomes irrelevant. If you are going through or have gone through this rejection and disappointment, it may feel like the end of the world right now but I promise you that it truly does not matter, and you will find your place and friends.