I have a problem with reality TV. The first problem is that I can’t seem to stop watching it, despite the fact that it’s pure brain rot. The second problem is how awful the people on these shows seem to treat each other.Â
My recent addiction is The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. I have been watching the first couple of seasons, and God, is it nostalgic. The early 2000s neon colors and capri pants, hot pink everywhere, and I mean everywhere, Paris Hilton, the crunchy foundation and bubblegum lip gloss. The whole show is just completely over the top with Beverly Hills glam and I just can’t get enough.
Yet, behind the smokescreen of money and an excessive wardrobe, lies issues that aren’t as fabulous. In season two, cast member Taylor Armstrong confronts the ladies about her marriage issues. She drunkenly confesses her unhappiness and the disconnection she feels with her then-husband Russell Armstrong, ominously explaining the abuse she has endured. The ladies do their best to support their friend, offering advice and support. Kyle Richards, who would go on to be a Real Housewife OG and fan favorite, tells Taylor that there is no point in being in a relationship where you aren’t happy. Camile Grammar offers similar support as a recent divorcĂ©e, inviting Taylor to lunch and explaining the value in independence. While a majority of the ladies attempt to help Taylor during this tumultuous time, others aren’t as quick to offer unconditional support. Lisa Vanderpump, the socialite queen and restauranter of Beverly Hills is hesitant to put prior misgivings behind and be there for Taylor. Lisa tells Taylor they’re not friends in episode six of that same season, and then proceeds to allegedly plant an article in People magazine claiming that Taylor and Russell have separated, causing Russell to angrily threaten to sue Lisa.Â
As I was watching this chaos ensue, I couldn’t help but think, what if my own friends treated me like this? Seeing grown women scream in each other’s faces and plant misleading articles in big-time magazines was no longer entertaining. It was, well, gross. Is there a TV show where grown men yell about each other’s divorces and talk shit behind each other’s backs? As far as I can think of, no! So, why is this something normal for women? We see these reality stars on TV and yeah sure, they fight for our entertainment, duh, but what does this teach us about female friendships? What does this tell us about how producers and writers in Hollywood think about how women should treat their friends?Â
My brain rot began to become a whole spiral of how we view female friendships. We all have had toxic relationships. We have all had that one crazy friend, that one girl that had us question the whole idea of friendship — but not all female relationships are like that. It’s okay to have a toxic friendship, but it’s not okay to normalize that type of relationship for girls. Maybe it isn’t all that deep, but The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reminded me of the importance of real friendship and being a good friend. At the end of the day, girls need to support each other, and jealousy and toxicity in female friendships shouldn’t be normalized.