If you don’t know what a man cold is, you’ve either never experienced it yourself or you’re not chronically online like most of us.
As a girl living with five guys (yes, five), I’ve experienced what it means to be mentally unprepared for them to fall ill. You can expect whining and asking a lot of favors, comically similar to a toddler. In my experience, college aged guys struggle with the man cold to most. When their parents would usually step in, they’re on their own. It’s important to keep your personal boundaries, so this is only for the guys you care about and know would do the same for you. Follow my list of these four requirements, and you might survive the mental anguish of man cold season.
Medicine
Let me tell you: boys will not prioritize purchasing Dayquill, so you are going to have to. Also, you get extra brownie points in the relationship when you’re the savior. If you really don’t want to spend upwards of $30 on cough medicine, at least get cough drops. Trust me, it will save you from them keeping you up all night with an absolutely heinous cough.
Lysol
When guys have colds, they revert to their prepubescent selves, meaning snotty faces and dirty hands. If Lysol’s carcinogenic qualities scare you away, there’s always more natural substitutes. Regardless, you are going to want a disinfectant.
Tissues
Although the classic toilet paper roll is sufficient, tissues are just barely easier to use, meaning less snot on their shirts and more on the paper. Pro tip: keep a trash can near them unless you want to spend time collecting their booger paper.
Hobby
Last, but probably the most important requirement to surviving man cold season is getting yourself a hobby. Believe me, you’re gonna want to get out of the house. Maybe it’s time to pick up badminton or become a regular at a cute coffee shop. Whatever it is, you’re not going to want to be at their beck and call, and you don’t have to. You’re not their mom.
You’d think most of these are just the basics for the common cold, but don’t underestimate the man cold’s treacherous reign over your life. If you want to (mentally) survive this season, it’s time to tap into your maternal instincts. Patience and preparedness go a long way.