Is It wrong to still yearn for love?
I am sitting in a coffee shop listening to the sounds of the coffee machine, the soft coffee shop jazz playing, and the chatter of lifelong friends partially catching up and partially discussing controversial topics. The people sitting next to me seem to be having a fabulous time. As I do my best not to eavesdrop on the conversations, I can’t help but to hear what seems like a very interesting topic that has been brought up. Through the act of not eavesdropping, I have been introduced to a point that I have never before put a lot of thought into over these past 18 years of life. Of course I think about it from time to time, how can you not, this is a topic that is everywhere, beginning with the first Disney princess movie that young girls watch. I don’t think that I have ever considered my stance on this topic of discussion in great detail before simply because I like to stay present and think about life for what it is now. This too, is not a very popular way of thinking about life in our ever competitive and overachieving world, especially for these college students who have just about reached the conclusion of the argument to which they all seem to agree.
Life partners. Disgust was the immediate reaction when someone brought up this fascinating and seemingly controversial topic. “Ughs” mixed with “ews,” “I’ve tried that,” “With who?” A question to which they responded with something bleak that caused me to lose interest and I eased my way out of their conversation. I couldn’t help but wonder why they find the idea of a life partner so unappealing? Is it simply because of the people which they surround themselves with? They can all agree that a life partner is not a must-have and, therefore, not a priority and in turn, “ew.” Is it because of their past experiences that have ultimately turned them off of the “dating to marry” path? Too many bad first dates? Too many failed situationships? Is it out of insecurity? Do they actually find it hard to believe that someone could love them in that way, for that long? Or vice versa? This reaction is so peculiar to me, I guess because I am only familiar with the way of life which involves two parents that fell in love, who have parents that fell in love, who have parents that fell in love. Take Disney princess movies, each one ultimately ends with the princess finding her prince, and they live happily ever after. Yes, I know quite a lot of people whose parents are divorced and I have been fortunate enough to grow up watching two people who love each other unconditionally. But, even the people whose relationships have ended in divorce, tried. They attempted happily ever after.
Sure, love can fade, love may not be unconditional, but I have yet to hear an “ew” when proposed with the idea of a life partner. So this has led me to wonder, is love fading? These twenty year olds do not find love appealing and I am sure they are not the only ones. Is it wrong for me to still want to find a life partner? That person that you love. The person that you have your good days and your bad days with. The person that knows your deepest darkest secrets. Is it wrong to want that traditional way of life? I suppose nothing is traditional anymore, it is all in what you make it.