Moving out of home and into a college dorm is stressful for all of us. Whether you’re moving on to a campus that is a couple blocks from home, or a couple hours by plane, the experience is bound to result in a complex mix of stress and excitement. However, most of us will remain in the same general society. Many students choose to stay in the US for their college education. Those few that decide to venture abroad to a different country to pursue their studies are faced with an additional set of worries. This was the case for my best friend, Emma Lips.
Although most of her family is from Holland, and she speaks Dutch fluently at home, Emma spent all of her childhood in the US. When the time came to make her college decision, she chose to leave behind much of what had grown familiar to her and attend The University of Amsterdam in the fall. Since her flight out of New York City, I have had the opportunity to watch one of the closest people to me grow to become the new woman she is now. I decided to interview Lips to see just what she thinks of her experience studying abroad in Amsterdam, and how her choice to leave the US changed her.
Growing up with most of her family living outside of the US, making the decision to go abroad wasn’t too difficult for Emma. While visiting her family, she gained a lot of experience in Holland. Lips also wanted to study internationally to help her further develop her Dutch. “We speak Dutch at home and I thought it would be a fun opportunity to practice it a bit more,” noted Lips when thinking about why she chose to go so far. Additionally, having so much of her extended family abroad helped comfort both Emma and her family. “I think the fact that it was to Amsterdam where I have relatives that live an hour away definitely helped,” but still, “It felt weird going so far especially as most people from my grade were going to school kind of near each other.”
Although it was scary to leave her family and friends behind, Emma was excited to meet new people and indulge in a new culture. She was nervous to make new friends – especially because international students often don’t get traditional dorm housing – but when asked if she regretted her decision, there was no hesitation in her answer. “No, I don’t think I ever regretted it. Have there been difficult moments? Oh yeah definitely. Of course it is hard moving away from everything you know and are comfortable with (and the time difference didn’t help), but I really have found my place here,” Emma said confidently.
When it comes to balancing being an ‘American’ and a ‘Dutchie,’ Emma finds it difficult to balance. She notes, “From an American point of view, yes I feel foreign 100% of the time. There is nothing really like home here. Everything is new and most people can’t relate to me in that sense.” On the other hand, “From a Dutch point of view, yes and no. When I am on my own in the city sometimes or with internationals (outside of NL) I usually feel very Dutch. Especially when I am on parts of my routine that I’m very comfortable with (like biking to school, going to get groceries, eating certain foods, ordering food, etc.). It comes from being familiar or growing comfortable with certain words or actions. This changes though when I am with fully, born and raised Dutchies. In that sense with some slang or ways of doing things I do feel a bit like an outsider. “Too American” for them. However, as she continues living and adapting in her new environment, more and more locals come up to Emma asking for directions, which Lips considers one of her biggest “wins” yet.
Through it all, Emma feels that her experience studying abroad has helped her “become a lot more independent. (she) is in charge of (her) own groceries, cooking, and going places,” and feels “more comfortable with being on (her) own and confident.” Although there are ups and downs to the experience, Lips acknowledges that moving to Amsterdam has prompted faster personal growth, and while she knows that same growth would have come along if she had chosen to stay in the US, the need for independence was significantly more urgent in a foreign country.
Going abroad may be daunting, but after doing it herself, Emma is confident that “everyone is capable of doing so and picking up life in a new spot.” What’s most important is that “you need to be brave to meet new people, problem solve in another language or culture, etc.. You also need to be open to learning about and embracing new cultures, not just for what they are, but also as your own new lifestyle. And most importantly, going abroad means you have to be okay with the fact that sometimes it is going to suck.” But sometimes, being in a situation that ‘sucks’ promotes the most growth. At the end of the day, through all the ups and downs, Emma wouldn’t change her decision in a million years and is excited to see how she continues to grow as an individual and a student.