If you would have told me three years ago when I was 16 years-old and in the thick of puberty that I would be writing a letter of gratitude to my parents, I for sure would have laughed in your face. Now, sitting in my apartment alone at 19 years-old trying to figure out this confusing life on my own, I think I finally understand my parents.
Growing up, I think the majority of the population had an interesting relationship with their parents. Whether that be not having any parents, or having some and absolutely despising them, or having parents and it always being complicated, I think the shenanigans that comes with having parents is something most of this population can agree on. I’m the oldest of four children, so you can imagine the absolute chaos that my household was in. But that was my family, known to be loving and laughing but always causing chaos. I can confidently say I had probably one of the best childhoods. My parents did everything they could to give me memories that I will take through my entire life: memories I tell at dinner parties and will eventually try to recreate for my own children.
Because of my parents I now get to look back on old photos of me on my bike with my Dad smiling in the back and grin because those days made me the human I am. I now get to remember the days my Mom took to the library to feed the ducks. I can vividly remember those days and how much I would look forward to them. Back then, I had no idea how much those days and memories were made because my parents made sacrifices. They chose us over anything. Because of those sacrifices I got to look out into the crowd during my band performance and see my parents smiling and waving at me telling me to smile for them. They made those sacrifices so that everyday at school pickup I knew that somebody was going to be there. Waiting. Always. Until I was an adult, I never knew how much my parents had to give up to always be there for me. My Mom and Dad gave up many work opportunities to be able to be there with open arms on Wednesdays after school. They lost a lot of nights out with their friends because they were at home watching “Frozen” for the hundredth time with their children. They gave up so much to be there: to this day I will never be able to put into words how much I appreciated the time and memories. I will never be able to thank them for that consistency and how it has carried me through life’s hardships. How having so much love at that young made me into the type of human I am today.
Experiencing puberty always causes an uproar in households. I know so very well that I was probably one of the worst daughters to ever be around during those years. In those years, pre-teens are experiencing so much and usually don’t blame anyone but your parents for that boy who broke your heart. For that best friend who called you a slut. For being confused and alone and sad, I could only blame one person and that was either Mom or Dad. I look back on those years and to be completely honest, it really hurts to remember some of the things I put my parents through. The quote, “cut your parents some slack, it’s their first time at this too” really cuts deep when I think back on those years. Of how sad and confused I was and how I didn’t understand that my parents were only doing what they knew they could. Back then I really didn’t comprehend how all of us are doing this for the first time and I know for sure, they were never the ones to blame. But it’s hard to know that when you’re in the thick of it. When you’re feeling all those things and having all those thoughts, the last thing you’re going to do is step back and think “what am I doing wrong here?”; no you’ll choose the easy route which is never the right one. But still, even as I would leave the house screaming at them, they were still there. They would be at that bike race, swim meet, or honor roll ceremony. They would be there. Because that’s the type of parents my parents are. Those are the type of people my parents are. So when I look back on those years, yes it causes me a lot of anger towards myself, but it also makes me admire how much my parents stood their ground and remained themselves. I will take that lesson throughout my life. Whether that be when I’m dealing with a tough roommate or colleague or even when I’m raising my own children, I’ll look up to how my parents were during those years.
So thank you Mom and Dad. Thank you for always being there. Thank you for being there when I was 5 and crying about someone stealing my Barbie. Thank you for taking me out to lunch when I was 7 and didn’t have anybody to eat lunch with. Thank you for forcing me to do that sport because now it’s what I live for. Thank you for being at that swim meet when I was 15 and was so nervous I almost barfed. Seeing you at an event always soothed my anxiety. Thank you for holding me and giving me advice when I lost that best friend. Thank you for telling me I’m better off without him when he broke my heart. Thank you for helping me with my biology homework at 10pm: I probably wouldn’t have passed without you. Thank you for showing me this world and giving me the chance to go and find myself in it. Thank you for taking me on those bike rides and being my best friend. Thank you for being the exact person I needed in that time in my life. Thank you for picking up my calls when I’m lonely and trying to figure out this weird thing called adulting. Thank you for being the most consistent thing in my life. Thank you for teaching me what it feels to be truly loved. Thank you for being the best humans I probably will ever know. I will spend the rest of my life trying to thank you and become anywhere near how good of parents you are to me.
You have made me into the human I am and I will owe everything in my life to you all. There will never be enough words to thank you for everything. I love you Mom and Dad.
Call your parents, they miss you.