I moved out of my family’s house about two weeks ago. It’s my first time being completely by myself in what’s essentially one large room with some furniture. For me and many others, adjusting to being alone more often has been a challenge. It’s supposed to mark a transition into adulthood, yet you may feel just as lost as you did at 16. With the unrecognizable noises and the absence of other voices, it can feel overwhelming. To help remedy this scarily new state, I wanted to share some things that have helped me adjust and become more comfortable during this new life stage.
One of the first things I did upon moving into my apartment was set up things that reminded me of home. I organized my books, clothes, and desk similar to how I used to have them. Everything was in the same place, so it felt like I was home. Doing this added a sense of familiarity to the space and made the transition easier. I also took the time to surround myself with things I love. Something as simple as playing your favorite music out loud or wearing a comfortable sweatshirt can make all the difference.
Another essential part of living by yourself is keeping your place clean. It can be repetitive and tiring, but having a routine is the best way to stay on track with other responsibilities. I’ve also found it helpful to treat mundane tasks like fun, therapeutic activities. This mindset takes the negativity out of completing chores that often help you feel more comfortable once they’re finished.
In the same vein, I’ve found it useful to parent myself. Once you live on your own, it’s up to you to remember to do everyday things like eating, doing schoolwork, and going to sleep at a reasonable hour. This can be difficult at first, but with time you’ll understand what works best for you and how you operate when you’re the most (and only) responsible adult nearby. I’ve realized that this helped me improve my self-discipline and set boundaries for how I spent my time.
It’s also important not to feel embarrassed about double-checking your space when it comes to safety. I often go back and forth between my room and my apartment door just to make sure the door is still locked – and that’s okay. Checking things before bed doesn’t make you paranoid, especially if it gives you peace of mind. Try to get to know the random sounds your home will eventually make. The sooner you get used to them, the faster you’ll lessen your nerves.
Remember that you’re not as alone as you think. Many people are in the same boat as you, and you can always rely on your support system, whoever they are. Whether you’re on your own for the first time or the first time in a while, it’s normal to be uncomfortable at first. But that’s the great thing about change, it pushes you out of your comfort zone to prepare you for the next stage. So embrace the discomfort, it only lasts for a little while.