It has been more than a year since the pandemic started. When everything was closing down including schools, most of us probably took it as a one-month vacation — at least I did. In the news, you probably heard that we are living in history. Following my high school teachers’ words, I started to write a diary to be a part of this history. When my school was still open, my teacher would make us read articles on how people in China were suffering because of COVID-19. At that time, I thought my life would never be affected by this new virus. Since I live really far from China, I thought that I would be safe. But, NYC was getting worse every single day without our knowing. I don’t think any of us saw this coming. Even though the number of people with COVID-19 was increasing every day, I still thought that I would be able to go back to my high school and have a proper graduation. However, life doesn’t always go the way we want it to go. Like everyone, I stayed at home, thinking that this is the worst thing that has ever happened to me. We got tired after staying at home all the time. People started to try out new things to spend their time. As this one month became two months, two months became six months, six months became one year, we lost the fighting spirit that we had at the beginning of this pandemic. Like most people, our family was struggling financially too. I really thought that this is the worst thing that has happened to our family so far.
As time passed, I thought everything would go back to its place. The number of people getting COVID-19 was decreasing every day. I thought that now I would just have to wait a little longer to meet the people that I hadn’t met for a year. But, time didn’t make my life easier. I didn’t know that my grandfather would be one of the COVID-19 victims. People say time heals everything, but it brought sadness to our family. I know that all of us have to go one day, but not being able to be next to our loved ones at the last moments of their lives is most heartbreaking. Thinking about how I told my grandfather that I will take him to my college once everything gets better makes me sad. He passed away on the day The New York Times dedicated their first page of the newspaper to show the number of people who passed away from COVID-19 related deaths.
Most of us think that 2020 was the worst year of our lives; it was my worst year too. But, now I cherish 2020; it was a year when all of my close relatives were here with me. The teenage me, who used to tell her friends that her grandparents from both of her family side are alive can’t say this anymore. I must say that I was naive to think that 2020 was the worst year of my life.
My grandfather’s death made me realize that this pandemic isn’t about feeling sad because I didn’t have proper graduation or a regular freshman experience at a college. This little thing can be important in someone’s life but my grandfather’s death overshadowed all of my sadness. I realized that I didn’t show enough empathy to the families who have lost their loved ones, and also that it took me a year to understand what this pandemic meant to the more than half a million families who have lost their loved ones.