The very beginning of quarantine feels like a lifetime ago. This was when grocery stores were still selling out of toilet paper, talk show hosts were still broadcasting from home, and people were desperately looking for activities to fill their newly-found free time. While my mom took up a few home-renovation projects, my cousin started painting, and my fellow Her Campus writer Claire realized her love for diorama making, I entered into a loving, committed relationship with Niall Horan.
What’s this, you ask? Oh, you hadn’t seen anything on the news about it? That’s because the reporters spelled my name wrong. People often think Emilia is spelled like Amelia. It’s a simple mistake, and I only hold it against them a little bit. But I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s rewind.
Like most relationships, mine started with indifference. I knew Niall for quite a few years; he was my second favorite member of One Direction, and although I’d liked his first solo album, Flicker, I only listened to a select few songs regularly. However, as quarantine days went on, I desperately needed something to do. So, when one of my close friends and fellow 1D lovers sent me the link to Niall’s newest album, Heartbreak Weather, I gave it a listen. And… I didn’t think it was anything special.
As time went on, though, I got the vague feeling that I was living in a romantic comedy, because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t get Niall out of my head. So I did what any main character would do and I plugged the aux into my phone and jammed out to his new album’s title track. Niall serenaded me, and for the first time, his words resonated. “All of my life has been heartbreak weather, thinking to myself ‘it won’t get better.’ It can be so lonely in this city, but it feels different when you’re with me.” And I don’t know if it was the early spring sun, my sadness from missing out on my second semester of college, or that I truly didn’t have anything better to do… but I was falling for Niall.
Niall made a guest appearance on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon a few nights later. He sang an acoustic version of “Dear Patience,” a song about anxiety and loneliness. It cleverly converses with a personified patience and asks it to talk over drinks and to “let go of the pressure.” The song was fitting for the times, and there was something so intimate and soothing about seeing Niall play from his own home. I realized that this scary, foreign thing I was experiencing was also something that Niall was experiencing in London, and that so many others were around the world. In that moment, I felt a little less isolated and alone.
So I kept listening to his music. With fresh ears, I loved the album. I loved that Niall made a breakup album that told a story, but that he wasn’t all sad and “woe is me.” It actually felt like the perfect quarantine soundtrack because Niall acknowledged that what he was going through was difficult, but he still remained hopeful. He was helping me stay hopeful, too.
Soon, I looked forward to seeing Niall’s daily Instagram stories and watching his livestreams. He played his guitar and piano, sang songs from his albums and by other artists, and talked about his day. I already knew a lot about Niall from being a huge 1D fan, but it felt special to get to know him in a more casual way. I related to him more than I ever had before. It was cool and comforting to know that someone I admired for years was also experiencing the same things I was. One night, I joked to my family over a Zoom call that Niall was my “quarantine boyfriend,” and I guess the nickname stuck.
If I used my imagination, I could pretend that Niall and I were in a long distance coronalationship. I watched all of his YouTube interviews (the ones with Lewis Capaldi are my favorite), pretended his Instagram selfies and videos were ones he only sent to me, and even dreamed that Niall joined my family in a competitive game of Cards Against Humanity. It was actually pretty funny, and one of the better dreams I’ve had in a long time. I wish it had been real.
Now all of this may sound cheesy, but in quarantine, it’s really the little things that go a long way. It was walking outside to get some fresh air, trying (and sometimes failing) at new gluten-free recipes, buying a whole Dairy Queen ice cream cake for my family to eat for the better part of the month, and Zoom calls with my family that happened more frequently than we got to see each other in real life. All of these things are little memories, things I probably won’t think of right away when I look back on this time in my life, but they are moments when I was able to forget about the state of the world — moments when I felt loved and understood. When I felt that, despite everything, things were going to be okay.
And I just want to thank Niall real quick for being a great boyfriend. He was always there when I needed him, he sang for me on command, and we never, ever, argued. So, thanks Niall. “Because it can be so lonely in this city, but [quarantine] feels different when you’re with me!”