Name: Colin Theodore Johnston
Major: Psychology
Year: Junior
Hometown: Arlington, Va.
Relationship Status: Single
On campus involvement:
“I’m kind of all over the place. I do FCA; it’s the Fellowship of Christian Athletes and we have a small group for that. I tried to get into the Astronomy Club… I tried three times to get in and they never got back to me. I gave them my email, but they never emailed me. But that’s okay. I wanted to join a fraternity, but I never had the grades to. I played intramurals my first two years, but then I stopped. I played a lot of sports growing up. I did football, basketball, baseball, wrestling, and I dove competively.”
“I was originially going to go to Randolph-Macon and I got waitlisted here (at CNU). The day deposits were due, I had an interview here, and within 5 minutes of the interview, they offered me admission. I don’t remember being that happy in one point in time since then. I knew right away that I wanted to go here.”
What’s been your most embarrassing moment at CNU?
“Not that I want that to get published… Well. Probably not. Alright, I’ll give you a brief summary. I showed up to a party that was ‘risky business’ themed in my underwear. JUST my underwear. My roommate had conviced me that all the guys would be dressed like that. They were not. Only my roommate and I. The sad thing is he really believed it, too.”
Who is your Man Crush Monday?
“Spencer Godine – he goes here, he was on the lacrosse team. We became friends last year and we have a lot of common interests. He’s not afraid to be goofy with me and I like to be goofy so that’s refreshing. And we both like western movies.”
Do you have a professor crush?
“Yeah, Dr. Mendham. I had him freshman year for a political philosophy class and he was just a really great professor. A great teacher. He taught us lots of interesting things about politics and I had never been interested in that before. It was a really cool class and a great experience.”
What has been the highlight of CNU for you so far?
“So this Homecoming, I saw two friends of mine – the last Homecoming Queen and a football player who graduated last spring – and he proposed to her on the football field at halftime when she passed down her crown to Mary-Kate (current Homecoming Queen) and that was pretty amazing.”
Give us your best joke.
“Okay. An American boat was sinking off the coast of Germany. So the Americans call to the German Coast Guard and they say, ‘Mayday mayday, we’re sinking!’ and the Germans bust in and say ‘Vat are you zinking about?'”
Now your best pick-up line?
“Can I stand next to you until it’s safe to go back to where I farted?”
What would be your perfect date?
“I would love to pick up the girl and take her on a nice hike during a cool fall day and then it would have to involve waterfalls and creeks. I love creeks. And after that we would have a nice candlelit dinner outside with some Frank Sinatra in the background. Maybe split a 6-pack of cold beer.”
Do you have a secret talent?
“Yeah, I can do a standing backflip and land on my feet. People don’t think I can do it because I’m heavy. But I can. I learned how to do it senior year of high school because my friend invited me to open gym night at the YMCA. I learned how to do a flip when you run up the wall and do it, and then a standing one. Since I’m a diver, it came pretty easily. Also, I’m pretty decent at the harmonica.”
Which Disney princess would you be and why?
“Probably Rapunzel because I would love to have a guy climb up my hair to get to me. It would test his strength, his perseverence to want to get to me, and the strength of my hair. But I would have a beard that long and she would have to climb up my beard.”
Tell us about your beard.
“Okay, so I’m in the Dollar Beard Club. You sign up and you choose how much you pay a month and you get oil, a comb, or whatever, and it’s way cheaper than buying it yourself. They last just as long. If you’re going to have it, you might as well keep it healthy. Healthy beards date back to the cavemen.”
“The first one is Johnny Cash lyrics and a bible verse in the shape of a cross. ‘I Walk The Line’ is a love song by Johnny Cash. A lot of people have a skewed view of him, rightfully so. But his capacity to love was so much greater than the average person. I grew up listening to him, loving his music, and I loved how he wasn’t afraid to be himself. At the end he was redeemed, he became a true Christian, and I love it. The other one is Romans 12:2. I chose that because it’s one of many verses that really speaks to me – it hits me deep in my heart. I see myself as a traditionalist in the way that I don’t want to conform to the norms; I like the way things used to be.”
Do you have a major life goal?
“Raise a badass family. Well, my son is going to have a beard out of the womb. My daughter, if I have one, gosh, bless her soul. She won’t be able to date until after she’s married. I can’t wait until I have something that’s truly my own, and I’ll share that with my wife. That’s a big time goal.”
What would you do if you were the last survivor of a plane crash?
“I’ll gather all the supplies I have. I’d try and find which direction is north to see where I am. If I’m near mountains, I’d try to find a peak and what’s around me. I’ll go back and set up camp. Probably kill a bear for its fur. Chop down some trees, build a log cabin, build myself a home. Honest answer.”
Is there anything that you want people to know about you?
“I have Tourette (Syndrome); I’ve had it my whole life. It’s something that gave me some interesting nicknames in middle school, but it also gave me a whole other crowd that I’m able to relate to. I’ve met a few others with it, and those conversations have been something I’m really grateful for. It’s closed doors for me, like I’ve always wanted to pursue a career in the military, but it’s a disqualification. And it’s completely strengthened my trust in The Lord. It’s also something that people are afraid to ask me about, but it’s a part of me so I wish they wouldn’t be scared. I have the twitches, the physical embodiment of it. I twitch, I blink, I used to hit myself in the crotch when I was little. I just thought it was normal. I used to readjust my neck and shoulders a lot, and it caused so much pain to my back and shoulders. I’ve learned how to control it better, but it’s still a struggle when I’m stressed or tired.”