Clemson Guy Reveals: What Type of Friend Are You?

I’ll admit it, I have a lot of friend that are girls. No it doesn’t make me gay or a loser, it just means that I got over the kootie phase early in life and my momma raised me with class and enough manners to not be a skeezball who sees every girl as a conquest. Regardless, there are many different types of roles that girls can play in being a friend to guys. This being said, here is my list of the different types of those friendships, followed by some shout outs to some of the best girls this guy could know.
 
The Friend From High School

Because we’ve already spent the past four years together, the Friend from High School is often one the first friends guys will have in college. This fact comes with a lot pros and cons. For us, it's great because we always have a conversation topic; who doesn’t love reminiscing about the epic Halloween party Sophomore year and running from the cops? Downside, this girl remembers you as the awkward 14 year old boy with moderate acne and access to too much Axe. However, for the most part, we love the Friend From High School because she often knows the most about us. Bonus points if the Friend From High School is the only other person from home at Clemson.

(Showing Thayer Academy pride years after graduation with Lily Bowen)
 
The Mom
For any guy this type of friend is a must.  It’s easy to find this friend quickly during Freshmen year when guys have realized how big of Momma’s boys we really are and need help figuring out the mystery of laundry. They are the girls that know the best way to cure a cold, and will make you the occasional meal and annual birthday cake. If you are underage, you may need to turn to them for an ABC run. In turn, guys are on-call to kill any spiders and unclog any drain. But for homemade chicken parmesan and chocolate chip cookies, it's totally worth it.

(My two Moms Jenna Gladney and Samantha Fasset take me to the baseball game).

The Go-To Date
It’s suddenly two days before
my next date function and I’m dateless. The recent hookup is iffy and I didn’t feel like getting set up. So I quickly text the Go-To Date: "Date function Thursday. Famous Couples.  Pick a couple." Within minutes, I get a text back "Perfect, I need to rage. JFK and Jackie O." Having this go to friend is necessary for guys but she has to be perfect. She’s gotta be good looking, no sense in bringing a dog to a function (WOOF). Handling her drinks is crucial (handling, get it???). I can’t be playing doctor all night. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES DO YOU AND THE GO-TO DATE HOOK UP. It makes it too awkward and it makes it impossible to invite you again without either side questioning things between us. In fact, I suggest the opposite, both of you go hookup with other people’s dates. It makes for a great story and you both end up happy.

(Hot date Samantha Warren, Check. Franzia, Check. Good night ahead, Check.)


The Bro-chick

This is the friend that every group of guys loves (and needs) to have. She’s the kind of girl that will make everyone nachos for the big game, eat her fair share, and rant about the quarterback’s lackluster performance in the pocket, and this is completely okay. A lady in her own right, this girl may have grown up in a house filled with boys, or just figured out the best way for guys to pay attention to her: beat everyone in a shotgun race. No doubt, this type of friend is vital to any guy in order to keep him sane amongst his sometimes neanderthal-esque bros.

(Bro-ing out before Alpha Chi Grab-A-Guy with Molly Robine)
 
The Girl You Sit Next To

I consider myself to be one of the luckiest guys in the world when it comes to classes. Why? Because I get to sit next to the nicest, funniest, and smartest girls in Clemson (shout out to the Comm Studies Department). Like any friendly Clemson student, I often get to know some of my female classmates fondly. While most conversations are often about how tired we both are, or how hard the upcoming test will be, sometimes something magical happens: We catch each other on a hungover Thursday or Friday morning and a friendship blossoms. I get a text reading “can’t move, take notes for me" and reply with something along the same lines. Even better: when you spot each other out at night , you then fully realize the greatness of one another for their ability to rage and yet still ace the final exam.

(That awkward moment when you run into your group partner and HCC Campus Correspondent Paige Dolton at a mixer and you’re both dressed like this)
 

The Twin

This friendship is very rare and I’ve only seen it a few times in my life, but luckily, I have had the pleasure of experiencing it. Sometimes, guys are able to find a complete copy of ourselves only in female form. It’s a strange concept, I know, but you feel like you can communicate with the person with simply a look. Guys can have a conversation with her so fast that no one else understands, and she is a guy’s go-to on relationship advice seeing as she understands both sides of everything. When it comes to girls, this girl is a guy’s life support.

(Inseperable at Semiformal with Morgan Eason)

Tagged: