The Worst Things About Fall
Starting September 1st, everyone begins singing the praises of a season filled with sweaters
and cinnamon. They dream of flannels and boots, whilst baking gloriously Autumn goodies
found on Pinterest. Truly, with the changing leaves and cooling temperatures, the fall is a
Yet, no one ever mentions the absolutely annoying things about this transitional season. You'll
hear a growing amount of complaints, but everyone seems to collectively ignore the direct
correlation to the changing season. Fall is not all Pumpkin Spice and everything nice! These are
just a few of unspoken atrocities committed by Autumn:
1. Awkward Weather Fluctuations:
The fall is not all perfectly crisp, sunny days with the right
amount of wind through your hair. Especially in the Upstate, weather is never, ever
consistent. The morning feels like a frosty, December day, but, by the time you get out of
classes, you're thrown into the heatwave of an August afternoon. This seasonal roller
coaster poses a serious problem wardrobe wise. You're left in uncomfortably mismatched
layers, counting down the days until this transitional season is over.
2. Inescapable Pumpkins:
Don't get me wrong, I love a pumpkin muffin with my morning
Starbucks just like every other basic girl in the world. Sometimes, however, the pumpkin
obsession goes too far. Everywhere you turn, you're bombarded with seasonally flavored
goods. From pumpkin Oreos and pumpkin Pringles to pumpkin hummus, some things just
don't belong in this world. There's even a pumpkin spice FourLoko. If that isn't a sign that we
need to evaluate ourselves as a society, I don't know what is.
3. Illness Epidemics:
In the fall, it feels like everyone is always sick. The changing weather,
the cold season rearing its ugly head, increasing allergen counts, and the need to spend
more time indoors really doesn't help anyone. In fact, this collision of calamities creates
chaos on college campuses. Better break out the buckets of hand sanitizer.
4. Stereotypical Fall Photos: I know everyone looks good in fall colors. I understand that
throwing leaves in the air makes everyone feel carefree and cute. I, too, adore apple picking
with friends. However, I don't need to scroll down my Instagram feed and see 17 versions of
the exact same picture posted by every single fall fanatic I know. Since this picturesque
season inspires an unavoidable desire to document all autumnal moments, maybe we can
all just try to add some variation to our poses in the hopes of becoming more original.
5. Lackluster Holidays:
This one's the big one. The fall is basically a seasonal waiting room
for the Most Wonderful Time of the Year. It's not like I start counting down to Christmas in
August (I do), but fall holidays pale in comparison to Christmas. Halloween is loses most of
its glory past the age of 10, and Thanksgiving just leaves you guilty with tightly fitting pants.
We're all just waiting until its appropriate to start listening to Michael Buble's Christmas
album on repeat...