I always look forward to returning to school each semester, especially in the fall. It’s such a joyful time full of fresh starts and new beginnings. I love the student activities fair, catching up with friends, and jumping into a fresh set of classes. However, this year things were a little different for me. My grandfather was suffering with stage four cancer. He passed away peacefully on September 5th, just a week and a half after the semester began. I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to handle the grieving process while still finishing my classwork and enjoying my last semester of college. It’s still difficult to deal with the recent loss, but I have found some tips that have helped me along the way.
1. Talk to Your Professors
Your professors are not heartless and mean individuals. If you have a loss in the family or an emergency, talk to them. My professors have been incredibly willing to work with me on deadlines and absences, as needed. It can be difficult to have these conversations, but it’s important to make your professor aware of what’s going on, especially if you need to miss classes.
2. Prioritize Self-Care
It can be hard during a new semester to put yourself first. However, during the grieving process, it’s important to care for yourself. If you are having a difficult time, do something nice for yourself. That might mean reading for pleasure, taking a bath, or even just watching a movie instead of working on class notes. If that’s what you need to do, then do it.
3. Be Honest
Don’t hold in your feelings for the sake of keeping the peace or acting normal. If you’re upset, be upset, if you’re feeling okay, that’s okay too! You don’t have to hide your true feelings or act the way you think you’re supposed to. Allowing yourself to truly feel the way you feel, will help you in the grieving process.
4. Talk to Someone
If you want to talk to someone about your feelings, we have a multitude of resources on campus. Talk to a close friend or significant other. You can even turn to a trusted adviser or professor. If none of those options appeal to you, try talking to someone at counseling services. Go with whichever option makes you feel safest.
Dealing with grief is hard. IIt will get better in time. We’re sorry if you are dealing with loss and we’re here for you.