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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

Staying Friends While Having A Significant Other

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Clarion chapter.

We have all been there, just recently dumped texting all of the friends we used to hang out with in hopes of rejoining the friend group that uses to have you enjoying life. The great thing about relationships is that eventually that person becomes your best friend. You share everything with that person and can always depend on them to be there for you. The real disadvantage to relationships, that everybody notices when it is way too late, is that you slowly lose your other friends over time and when you inevitably lose your best friend/significant other, you are left completely alone.

I hate to be a pessimist and say that you will lose your significant other no matter what. The truth is that if you do not lose them, then you will marry them and need time away from them. The most important thing that anybody in a relationship can do to keep the love alive is to maintain their friends/social circles.

It is hard to maintain friends, especially when you first start dating your significant other, but it is crucial to your mental stability. The beginning of the relationship is the most delicate stage for both your friends and your significant other. You have to find a perfect balance or you risk losing one. The most important thing to do is to divvy your time up accordingly. If you and the friends typically hang out once a week on the same night, never ever blow that off to be with a significant other.

You and your significant other are two separate individuals who happen to be together. Maintain your individuality. Encourage your significant other to hang out with their friends too. This will help to establish trust, set a good standing for you in your significant other’s friends’ points of view, and give you the balance that you need.

It is extremely tough when you both live farther apart from each other. Long distance relationships have their own unique complications. But, if you live within 2 hours of each other there is absolutely no need to see each other every weekend or drop everything to see each other. Every once and a while it is nice to be able to drop everything to see each other but make that a rare occasion. For the further distance relationships, it makes more sense to see each other on a moments notice, but most likely that will not be every weekend.

Remember that your friends are there to pick you up when the others are gone. Sometimes not all of them come back to you after being left for a significant other. Show your friends that you care for them and appreciate them. Friends are the family members that you choose. They will always be there for you so long as they choose you too. They need to see you as a family member that they want, but if you leave them for your significant other, over time they will think you are not a family member that cares and they will stop caring too. Keep your friends close because they are the ones that keep you sane. It does not matter if you are taken and they are single, or you have a mix of singles and takens in the group. Stay together and you can weather any future storm that may come, like a break up.