First dates are never easy. From considering what to wear, what to what to do there are a million things you have to consider before you can even get out the door! But fear not, here is your comprehensive guide to everything you need to know to have the perfect first date!
1. What to wear?
Choosing an outfit for a first date is like playing one of those Barbie Dress Up Games you used to play as a kid. There are way too many options and nothing feels perfect enough for the occasion. But newsflash! I can promise you your date will like your outfit if you like your outfit. Trust me I’ve worn it all: tube tops, corduroys, slip dresses, platforms, sandals, sweaters and more.
In every single case I’ve gotten the same compliment, “I like your outfit.”
If I spent five minutes or five hours, it didn’t matter! Truth is we overthink our own outfits way more than anyone else will. Wear what makes you feel great and what will be appropriate for your date (pro-tip, super tight jeans to a movie date is NOT the move!)
2. What to do?
A first date should be a get to know you moment, you need enough activity to help fill any awkward silences that will naturally occur but you also need enough time to really get a handle on what their character is. My recipe for a good date will be one food related activities such as dinner or ice cream, one talking based activity like going for a walk or getting coffee after a meal, and one random activity that can range anywhere from playing some sort of game to driving around with them! To me this sequence works because if at any moment you feel things aren’t going too hot you can dip out after one of the stages. It allows for natural conversation to build and keeps you moving so you don’t run out of things to do!
3. When to do it?
There is always so much pressure for there to be a “date night” well what about a date morning? Or a date afternoon? Night time is not the only time to plan for a date! Take advantage of what the different times can bring! Mornings can be the perfect time to hit up your favorite brunch spot, the afternoon can be awesome for visiting your city’s local museums! Don’t limit what you can do to a certain time!
4. What do I talk about?
My rule of thumb is whenever I start a first date the first thing I will ask them how their day was. It is an easy way to get conversation flowing and allows you to jump off of things they mention. It also never hurts to just ask the basic getting to know you questions like what kind of music they enjoy or the last good book they read. Finding common interests is how you build connections. When in doubt just ask them questions, people love to talk about themselves, asking questions takes the pressure off of you and let’s you get to know your date better.
5. What to do at the end of the date
How your date ends will, of course, depend on how the date goes. I’ve had dates where I’ve politely excused myself from it half way through and I’ve had dates that have lasted upwards of four hours! Some end with barely a hug, others with a magical perfect kiss. There is no correct way to end a date, do whatever feels natural and comfortable for you! Your date does not have to end with a kiss, a kiss doesn’t mean nearly as much as you think it does. However your date ends, what really matters is how you follow up.
We often tend to put too much pressure on ourselves for what a first date should be. Not every first date is going to feel like that magical movie moment. A first date is all about getting to know the person you’re interested in and learning about how they are in social situations! It should be fun and light hearted. First dates are important but they aren’t everything for the relationship.