We all know them (or at least know of them) and we all love them! Those cheesy Hallmark Christmas movies that are usually somewhat nostalgic and always feature a slew of different romantic tropes: childhood best friends turned lovers, next door neighbors who somehow haven’t realized that they are meant-to-be or even long-time friends who have just never realized what’s been in front of them this whole time.
I’ll be honest, I’ve only seen one Hallmark Christmas movie (and it’s on the list!), which is a little shocking to me. I love romance and I love Christmas, so what could be better than those two things in one movie? For this article, I’m going to be reading about and watching the trailers for 10 Hallmark Christmas movies and ranking them in order from the most cheesy to the least.
1. A Christmas Detour (2015)
A woman is engaged and she’s getting on a flight to somewhere. She’s seated next to a guy who she’s inevitably going to fall in love with (even though she’s engaged? I have questions…). And then the unthinkable happens! The flights get cancelled for the night! But wait, it gets worse (and by worse, I mean better. This is the cheesiest movie on this list, after all)! The two have to share a room! How is she going to explain this to her fiancé? Judging by the way the guy asks if they’re soulmates, she’s going to have a fiancé at the end of the film – and it won’t be her current one. The woman only talks to her fiancé once in the trailer, so the problem here probably has something to do with that lack of communication.
2. Once Upon A Holiday (2015)
A princess runs away and meets a normal guy. You can guess what happens next – they fall in love! The cheesiest line in the trailer is about how the princess has finally found her “fairy-tale ending.” Cute!
3. A Christmas to Remember (2016)
(Apparently there is another movie with this same title; this is not a remake.)
The woman is driving and she somehow runs into a snow pile. A guy finds her and she can’t remember anything after hitting the snow pile – absolutely nothing, not even her name! I’m assuming they fall in love but I don’t know because the trailer wasn’t very clear. But this is Hallmark we’re talking about, so romance is bound to happen.
4. Love at the Christmas Table (2012)
This movie seems very familiar to me, but I don’t know why. Sam and Kat have been sitting next to each other at the Christmas Eve dinner table for the past 30 years. This is the only time they see each other, but you wouldn’t be able to guess that based on how close they are. How can you really, truly know someone when you only spend one night a year together? One Christmas Eve, as shown in the trailer, Sam brings his girlfriend to dinner, which of course complicates things. The cheesiest line: “I know what it’s like to see the person you love with the person they’ve chosen, and it’s not you.” (That’s actually deep and kind of sad.)
5. The Mistletoe Inn (2017)
The final movie on this list is by far the least cheesiest of the ones I’ve researched. Two writers, Kim and Zeke, meet at a writers’ conference in Vermont. They don’t like each other at first, but that will obviously change over the course of the movie! The actors in this, as in all Hallmark Christmas Movies, look vaguely familiar. Judging by the way the voiceover on the trailer announces their names, you’re supposed to know who they are (I didn’t). The cheesiest line: “I can’t not chase after you!” This is still pretty cheesy, but not as cheesy as asking someone if you’re soulmates with them even if they are engaged to someone else and you have (probably) only known them for, like, an entire day.