Consent is a word that lingers throughout college. You hear about it, know you should have it, know you should get it, but sometimes people don’t know exactly how it works. By definition, consent is an ongoing verbal agreement between people(s). It doesn’t always have to be between sexual partners, it can be between co-workers, friends and family, too.
It should be obvious by now, but us girls need to ask for consent from him too, it’s extremely important! You would rather have an awkward conversation making sure it’s okay to do something with someone than to be unsure. It’s important to make sure consent is verbal and sure. Think about a type of food you really like, one you know for sure you would want that food, but maybe not right now. According to my Human Sexuality course at UC, 1 in 25 men in college claims that they have been sexually assaulted by a female. It’s important to respect the decisions of others and realize not everyone can be in the mood at the same time as you.
Let’s talk about your form of consent. It’s important to understand your body and how to tell if you want to do something. I know they might be super cute and you might have been dancing with them all night, but in no way does that entitle you to do anything with anybody. Make sure your “no” is clear and concise, stand your ground! If they can’t respect that or think of you differently because of it, then I don’t think you would want to be getting with them anyways. It should be obvious but, you can’t give consent if you are unconscious. It’s doesn’t matter if you had been flirting with them or even gave them more than a kiss. The second you are completely out of it, that’s not consent. It can be an embarrassing thing to have drank a lot, but it is important to talk to someone if this has happened to you.
If you or anyone you know has been a person of sexual assault or un-consensual sex, a great resource for those seeking help is the National Sexual Assault Telephone Hotline. They can be reached at 1-800-656-4673.