This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Chatham chapter.
When my older sister decided to go to a Historically Black College/University, HBCU, it threw a monkey wrench into my plans. Suddenly everyone was asking if I was going to follow her footsteps and attend Hampton University or if I was at least going to go to any other HBCU. I seriously considered these options and even got accepted to a few, but decided it was not for me. Instead, I found a different college experience that I believed to be unique as well.
I chose Chatham University, a college, at the time, for women. A single sex institution appealed to me for many reasons and the program that I was interested in seemed fantastic. This university also happens to be a Predominantly White Institution—or PWI. This was something I considered when choosing a place to continue my education and wondered if the environment would be one that I wanted to experience after high school. My education came first, however, and I chose the school that gave me the most attention and the best program options.
I think Chatham is the place for me right now. In my first year here, I came into myself more than I ever had and learned how to speak openly about topics that I am passionate about. I love the skin that I’m in and wouldn’t change for anything. With this self-love and love for some of the people I have met at Chatham, I reflect on the last year of my life and what it has taught me.
I think that for many people of color find some tension being in a white-dominated group especially in an intellectually charged environment. Conversations about hot topic issues regarding race aren’t at all the same as if I were talking to some friends who are also part of a minority. A productive and respectful conversation about subjects like Black Lives Matter vs. All Lives Matter or underrepresentation in the media can and do happen which is great. But at times those conversations turn into some of the few minorities on campus explaining how they feel about this topic as a representative of their race and culture. These are not equally balanced discussions and can quickly become exhausting.
The times that frustrate me most are when my white peers overwhelmingly dominate a class discussion about women of color. An ally of the black community should not hold more relevance or be held in more esteem than the voices of actual students of color. It’s part of the white feminist culture that has been heavily present on my campus since I have set foot on it. There are many of my classmates that I appreciate of course. Some classmates are willing to listen, to learn, and to work to make this institution better. But there are also members of the Chatham community (students, faculty, and staff) who will make some students feel invalid. Every topic that I bring up shouldn’t be countered with “no, that’s not right,” “racism doesn’t exist,” “not all… do…” or anything of the like. Making it my job to call out problematic feminists shouldn’t be and isn’t something that I’m putting ahead of my studies, but I do try to voice my opinion on these topics.
Even simple things like discussing beauty routines can be challenging. My naturally curly hair simply won’t be able to undergo the daily washes of my peers. The positive outlook being that I knew the many floor meetings about making sure to pull the long hair out the shower drains eliminated me as a suspect. And those TV moments when a white co-worker tells their colleague of color that something about them is “insert adjective that is not quite right here” are based on real life. When my Senegalese twists got called “exotic” at my office job on campus, I was more aware of the lack of black culture on my campus than ever. Even without the twists when my hair is a curly fro, someone’s eyes will lock on my hair and I know they’re going to go for it. Some people ask first… some people don’t.
There is also a blessing in being part of a PWI. Organizations like the Black Student Union and the Muslim Student Association are Godsends. Meeting with other POC is something I would consider essential for anyone in a similar situation of mine. It’s like a breath of fresh air when I know that someone has gone through what I’ve gone through and I don’t have to give a disclaimer or a metaphor for them to understand. Even talking to people of color who aren’t my color is a beautiful experience.
My time at Chatham has had its ups and downs, but I will continue here until life takes me somewhere else. The truth is that, in every PWI that I have attended, it’s the people with whom I wish to spend my time that make the experience great no matter their race or ethnicity. There will always be ignorance and white feminism in my path, but it’s how I am learning to handle them that make me stronger, smarter, and happier. To those who have welcomed me and have made me feel like I have a voice as a student of color, thank you and I hope you stay in my life. To those who haven’t, don’t knock my melanin.