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An Open Letter To My Heartbroken Self

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Chapman chapter.

I know what you’re thinking right now. I know you’re thinking that you’ll never get rid of that subtle pain in the left side of your ribcage that throbs when you crawl under the covers at night. But you will. And I know that you can’t stop wishing and hoping that he’ll come back — but stop. Seriously, stop. I know you just wanted to help, but you cannot save everyone. Some people are going to destroy themselves no matter how much you try to help them. Don’t destroy yourself in the process of trying to save someone who doesn’t want to be saved. Let go.

You see, not all toxic people are cold and uncaring. Some of them care about us immensely and have good intentions. But they are toxic to us simply because their wants and needs get in the way of ours, and soon we are letting their desires trump our needs and we start to crumble. The truth is that some people simply aren’t capable of looking outside themselves — outside their own struggles, responsibilities, anxieties — and the thought of reaching out to someone else doesn’t even cross their mind. That doesn’t mean they’re a bad person, just that they’re self-focused. And it doesn’t mean that you are not worthy of their effort or affection and it doesn’t mean that you aren’t worthy of love.

So don’t get angry at him or her for not being very good at looking beyond their own world. Praise yourself. You are capable of sharing your love and light with others, even when you feel surrounded by darkness, and that’s a strength. Don’t let words echo in your mind. You are not too sensitive. You are not too needy. You are simply craving a person who is able to give you as much as you give others. And you will find that person. But just remember: Even though you don’t have a special someone affirming you and acknowledging you right now doesn’t mean you aren’t enough. You will always be enough.