Why You Should Take Yourself on Dates

At the beginning of my freshman year, I was one hundred percent convinced that I was going to meet my soulmate at some point throughout my undergraduate experience. My parents met in college after all, and all of my other married relatives started dating in high school. Everyone in my family married young. At the very least, I was sure I would find a boyfriend at some point within my time at Chapel Hill. We would go on picnics, watch movies together and go on unforgettable adventures. He was going to sweep me off my feet and be the greatest thing that ever happened to me, and all those milestones I felt like I had missed out on in high school would be something I would finally get to experience.

Almost four years later, I am still single — and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

My senior year is coming swiftly to an end, and I don’t have a lot of regrets when it comes to romance. Though it was definitely a struggle along the way, I have learned to keep my standards high and try not to settle for less than what I deserve. What I do regret is that, for a long time, I thought I was going to miss out on something special.  My whole life I had been told that college should be the social prime of my life, but in reality, everything I needed was right in front of me.

Many of those milestones I wanted to overcome — the unforgettable adventures I wanted so badly to experience — were things I realized I was encountering every day, all while fostering lifelong relationships with some of my closest friends.

Eating alone is nice sometimes. Taking myself out to dinner can be refreshing after a long day. Going for long drives and screaming along to my road trip playlist is an unforgettable experience. Treating myself to coffee and a book is near heavenly.

It may sound cliché, but you really are the only person that you will have to spend every moment of the rest of your life with, which is why I started taking myself on dates — why I will still take myself on dates, even when I find myself dating other people.

Your relationship with yourself is the most complex, most dynamic and most fruitful lifelong friendship you will ever have. So take yourself out on picnics. Go out for long walks alone. Dance into the late hours of the night. Buy yourself something nice. Spoil yourself. Take time to get to know yourself better. Make commitments to yourself and honor them. Go outside of your comfort zone and grow.

You deserve to love yourself.