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Why it is Okay to not be Okay


At some point in our lives, we were told that it wasn’t okay to show our emotions. Whether that was from the article we read in Seventeen magazine way before we were 17, or the TV show we stayed up late at night to watch, we convinced ourselves that in order to be strong we had to be ‘okay.’ So, through the breakups and the make ups, the fights and the tribulations, and the missed deadlines in life, we told everyone we were okay. But what we seemed to forget along the way was it’s okay to not be okay.

Something you don’t want to happen inevitably will.

    No matter how hard you may try to keep the boy who is cheating on you from cheating on you again, or to get back at the friend who lied behind your back, your boyfriend is going to keep hurting you and your friend is going to call you the liar. There are so many things in this life that we cannot control, so why don’t we choose to allow ourselves to feel and control the one thing that we can? Life sucks sometimes, and nothing you do will stop bad moment from heading your way. But what you can do, is prepare yourself for the wave that will ultimately crash, and prepare yourself for the aftermath.

Everybody gets hurt at least once in their life.

    Whether it is the person who breaks your heart or the job you almost had, at some point in your life you are going to get hurt. Except this time, you can’t just put a bandage over your heart and be fine. Instead of telling everyone you are okay, reach out to the people whom you love the most. Everyone in life has problems, and whether they admit to it or not, the one thing they hate most is people who seem perfect. Nobody likes perfect people, because no one is actually ever perfect. We all know it. Put away your fake smile and allow yourself to not be okay. You may be surprised to see how many people are not okay just like you.

The best lessons come from the worst moments.

   Everything will eventually fall into place. Whether that means tomorrow or in three years from now, you will be living the life you have always hoped for. But for now, take the mess ups and the failures as a learning lesson. I was once told that if you learned something from failing then it wasn’t a failure at all. Find the positives to every negative, and learn from your past. It’s perfectly fine to wallow in sadness, but then stand up as a stronger, better person than you previously were. Admit to your mistakes, apologize for your wrongdoings and move forward with your life. 

Stop putting so much pressure on yourself to be perfect all the time. There is nothing better than a person who accepts the challenge to conquer everything that comes their way. And if you screw up, who cares? Just remember, it’s okay to not be okay and you’re already one step ahead of the next person.

Carleigh Barnett is a sophomore at UNC-Chapel Hill and is majoring in Journalism. She specifically hopes to have a career in entertainment Public Relations. From New York to North Carolina, she loves watching TV (especiall dramas that are filled with gossip), staying connected with the world of entertianment and enjoying days filled with Netflix and Sour Patck Kids.