Summer is quickly approaching and so are your killer plans. Maybe you scored a noteworthy internship in the city that never sleeps. Or perhaps you nabbed a picturesque beach cottage feet from warm, soft sand. Or, maybe you are dead set on beating your record for most grape popsicles eaten in one backyard lay out sesh. (I won’t pretend like this isn’t what I’ll be doing.)
Regardless of your plans, there will be one notable thing missing — your personal Campus Cutie. It is true that going from living a short walk away from each other to living a few hours or more away will be a huge adjustment, but do not fret collegiette! There are ways to get through it, without exhausting all of your Alanis Morissette albums.
Make Plans and Get Busy!
I asked a friend who will be living on nearly opposite ends of the U.S. from his Carolina girlfriend this summer what he felt would help with the distance. He simply replied, “Plan a trip to see each other.” By doing this, you will have something to look forward to beforehand, and something to think fondly of after. Chances are, you may already have plans with your shnookums. Score.
Another friend who will be hours away from his girlfriend this summer told me like an angel, “I’m gonna talk to her at least once a day even if it’s just one text.” Talk about a base level of communication you would be happy with. Agreeing to text goodnight every night could make you feel more at ease. Just beware of flying off the handle at the occasional slip-up. Keep lines open for the flirty, “Saw the Old Spice commercial; Thinking of you J” text. It will do nothing but strengthen your trans-state love connection.
The key part of making plans here, however, is to not only make them for the two of you, but to make them for yourself. Now, this is easy if you have the killer internship or job, but even then, avoid the stretches of time you may be tempted to wait for communication. That’s right, I’m advising to not be by your phone all the time. Always remember that it is your summer, and you’ve earned the right to enjoy it.
Don’t Ruminate. Be in the Moment.
Whether you are spending the summer in a different country, a different city or just your regular ol’ home, there are tons of people and places to see all around you at every moment. It is not unusual that you will be hyper-aware of every text message you and your BF exchange, how many minutes you spent on the phone in the last week, the tone of his voice when he said goodnight to you last Tuesday. But try to relax. He is likely not over-analyzing why you did not pick up your phone until its third ring, so you shouldn’t either. Also, be careful to not let missing him suddenly turn into wanting to snap his head off with a bottle opener. Really. It is scary how these two emotions can coincide.
Making yourself happy by seeing friends and being productive is likely the most alluring thing you can do in a boy’s eyes. There is something about being happy that will make a guy stick to you like a fly to spilled Kool-Aid. That is why having a great, fulfilling summer regardless of who can be there to put sun-block on your back should be priority number one.
A boy recently said to me, “I think keeping the love alive isn’t something that needs to be consciously done. If it’s there, it’ll work itself out.” So there. Dial down the stress and amp up the fun.